I have trouble trusting people anyway. I’ve been eating lunch with three women at work for the past few years. One day, about two weeks ago, one of them decided she didn’t want to be friends with me anymore. She was really mean. So, I couldn’t go into the room where she would be to eat lunch anymore.
The other two women are still eating lunch with her and couldn’t care less that I’ve been exiled… I’m alone at lunch now.
So, although my distrust may appear unhealthy sometimes, it has a way of proving itself.
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I would find new friends.
That is mean.
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I knew she could be a hateful person. I was still surprised when she turned it on me.
You’re right, @Wave. Or no “friends” seems ok right now too. Only one more month to summer break and no lunch times… 
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These women haven’t grown up much since high school,
I wouldn’t consider it much of a loss.
No one likes being excluded, but sounds like you’re better off alone,
These women deserve each other.
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If I had to choose a “theme” for my life it would betrayal. I’m more or less done with people in real life. I can talk to them and be polite but that’s it.
Shame on all three of them.
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I think a peaceful lunchtime alone is better than being surrounded by mean people. I’ve been abandoned by people I thought were my friends before. It’s better to have no friends than bad ones, in my opinion.
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I was alone a lot in high school. Now I work at a high school and here we go again!
The hateful one doesn’t bother me as much as the other two just accepting what she did and that I’m alone now. No compassion for me at all.
More than the loss of their company, which I hardly feel at all, it’s the feeling of having been wronged that hurts me. What is it with people?
Thanks, @GoldenRex. 
️
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You always understand, @everhopeful. ️ Unfortunately for the both of us.
I may be forgetful and socially awkward, but I’m not mean. I don’t understand meanness.
Sorry you’ve been betrayed by others too. It’s exhausting, especially when you keep on trying. I’m 51 and I just keep trying! I must be really stupid…
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You’re right, @ZombiePupper. I’ve started going on a walk at lunchtime and listening to music. It is better, to be honest. What I haven’t resolved yet is why they would do this.
But I need to let that go.
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I’ve been hurt by a supposed friend before one after trying to contact her 5 years after, and another thinking he was better than me.
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I’m sorry, @see121. It’s a real puzzle, what people find acceptable and what they feel is throw-away in another human being… it’s confusing.
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I’m so sorry, @Hedgehog. The two other women are being cruel to you. I have been left behind by “friends”, and I never understand why. You didn’t do anything wrong- the other woman did by treating you wrongly. She should be the one that is snubbed, not you. She is the one with the problem. By siding with her, they are condoning her childish behavior. You don’t deserve that.
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I wonder what would happen if you ate with the other two and snubbed her maybe they would join in.Perhaps they are sick of her ways too and need reinforcement?
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I couldn’t do that for two reasons: 1. They eat at her desk, and 2. I don’t want to be friends with women who are either too weak to stand up for what’s right or too cruel to care about someone who is mistreated. It’s hurtful and surprising, but useful information at the same time.
You understand perfectly, @Happy_H. Thank you! ️
I’m sorry, @anon21849028. Rednecks are the most dangerous kind of human, IMO, because they really believe they’re good people while they put down and hurt others…
My little drama at work doesn’t compare, but it’s still the willful ignorance and cruelty of one human against another. I don’t understand it on any level.
Sorry you’ve been in so many dangerous situations before manny, that’s scary… But I still have to point out the irony of calling people names such as redneck and hick and not seeing that as the same demeaning behavior you complain about. Guess what confuses me is name calling allowable but only for some? We all know violence is wrong but what are your views manny and hedgehog on name calling or generalizing? since you both generalized a group of people and called them names and asssumed they are the most dangerous? Is that not predjudice or prejudgement too Do we all do it and only notice when we’re being insulted?
I appreciate your desire for fair and equal treatment for all, @finally. If I had no experience with the term Redneck or the people who identify themselves with that name I would absolutely have nothing to base my “name-calling” on. However, I have lived the past five years in an area dominated by a society/demographic/culture which proudly labels itself, to a member, as Rednecks. All the connotations that the label may conjure apply with surprising accuracy. Are there genuinely “good” people amongst them, of course, so my generalization of dangerousness doesn’t apply 100%. But when speaking in generalizations in regards to any group or culture of humans, it is impossible to be 100% accurate because there will always, thankfully, be individuals who differ from the generalization. But then the argument might be whether they really belong to that group or not.
Thanks hedgehog i really just wanted an honest opinion because i keep hearing name calling is verbal abuse lately . yet i hear people call people names like stupid or low life or dumb or lazy or drunk etc etc so is it abuse to call someone a redneck or hick and saying they are the most dangerous. i mean i didn’t mean to single you two out as the only examples of this behavior. i hear it all the time and ask people is this abuse or what? When I was growing up it wasn’t considered abuse. now if the guys got in a fist fight they went to the principals office. But no one said anything about name calling. And i still see examples of it daily online or when people stop by. it was just an example of what i see all the time. people saying name calling is abuse and then turn around and call people names. I mean my dear sweet 90 year old mom will once in awhile call out jerk to the tv when it’s someone she doesn’t like. I’m just confused. i mean i see really nice people name call and generalize fairly often. So is it all abuse? All people who walk the earth are verbally abusive. Has me confused. I guess it’s the whole mixed messages when people use the b word on tv no one calls out verbal abuse or do they?
I really am impressed that you’re giving this so much thought because you’re right that people do a lot of name-calling and it’s not always ok.
I guess I felt comfortable because, literally, a lot of people where I live identify themselves proudly as Redneck, fully knowing the negative connotations. Would I say, to an individual who did not want to be identified as a Redneck, that he/she was one? No, of course not. I’m not about hurting people. I identified a group called Rednecks as dangerous because ignorance is a major component to this group and ignorance is dangerous. If I yelled it into a group at a local bar, I wouldn’t be hurting anyone. They’d all probably hold up their beers and cheer. I understand this sounds derogatory, because it is, but it hurts no one. Having said that, if an individual came up to me and said, “hey, I’m a Redneck and what you said really hurt my feelings,” I would apologize.
Abuse is the willful infliction of pain. There is intent to harm. That’s not what I was doing, but, again, if what I wrote did hurt anyone particularly and they let me know, I would apologize .