For those who have cracked this code, please let us know your tips!
I am pretty bad in both of these areas, and I really want to improve it
Negative thoughts plague me a lot, as well as my brain automatically providing put downs all day
Want to get better at this
If you have your love and belonging needs met, you can find meaning pursuits to increase your self-esteem.
I hate to be negative but it’s an uphill climb if you have the wrong people in your life. I thought people around me would want me to be confident but it was just the opposite. I got a little confidence in the year and a half I was in the group home. I lost a lot of fear and was genuinely happy and liked people and some people liked me. It was the first group home that I was in where people stood up for one another and supported each other. But when I got back into regular society all my lessons learned were not appreciated. And yes, I will blame certain people for tearing me down and destroying any confidence I gained. I had a neighbor who was bent on destroying me and the counselor didn’t do a damn thing in two years to stop him. And I got in conflicts with other neighbors where I lost so badly I’m really afraid to try to gain any self respect or confidence because I can’t go through all the mental agony that comes along with it.
I’m beaten down and broken. Nothing comes free in this life. I’m still facing the residual punishment for daring to stand up for myself and feel good about myself. People don’t want you to change and will go out of their way and will do anything to stop you.
Sorry to hear that @77nick77 
I sometimes think it would be a good idea to be in a group home environment to adapt to fit back in, but from what you say there it didn’t last - the benefits of that I mean
Sucks
Know what it’s like to have bad neighbours
My self-confidence and self-esteem issues disappeared after my first psychotic episode. Delusions of grandeur really help. 
I keep a recovery diary. I have an area where I write down successes. I can flip through it when I’m feeling low and remind myself that I do some things well that most NTs can’t do at all. Perks me back up again.
I’ve also worked hard enough at some things that I no longer doubt my skill level. I’m well aware that I photograph at a Master’s level. With that, I’ve stopped worrying about what others think about my photography and have started worrying about passing on my thinking about photography to others. I’m now one of the people carrying a chunk of the craft around in my head. I have a responsibility to share it.
I self talk to myself in the mirror…helps me immensely…I compliment myself and talk about things that bother me…helps me.
At my advanced age, I’m still refining self-talk.
Also, self-talk has the potential to be horribly destructive.
Its Illness that Makes Us (■■■■) Weak Ass … But Dont Loose Hope…
Self confidence comes easier with having success with whatever you do. You can achieve this by attempting things that seem daunting at the time or acknowledge when times are tough that you are still getting along, despite all odds. You WILL get through this, and you do. Acknowledge that.
Self esteem comes with understanding your own self worth, regardless of whatever others think. You can get higher self esteem from outside sources, like people praising your work, but really it’s about you reminding yourself that you are valued , you have self worth, and that you will make mistakes in life and have challenges but that doesn’t make you less than who you are.
I’m sorry that you’re struggling with this too. I have no self-confidence nor self-esteem. I’m very much convinced that no one would love me. I just believe people’s love and appreciation towards me are fake. I sometimes find myself despising people then hate myself even more because I think this way. I just don’t know how to get around it.
Listen to this.
It’s a big question & I have managed it to an extent, but I still get down periods,
You need to ask ‘what can I do to overcome these challenges’ and then you should be driven to achieve what you can.
I asked for help and it was fulfilled and it made me want to strive to accomplish what I could, not too much or too little just enough for the moment and something to build on,
So, I would say that once you ask for help, you will receive it and it should help you in your struggles.
My self-confidence and self-esteem is gossamer thin. I’m rather inept/useless at a lot of things, and the one thing I’m quite good at.(apart from finding articles to post) tends to p*** people off, and is neither use nor ornament
Self-esteem is a tough one for me too. The two voices in my head have made it their mission to tear me down and undermine my confidence every day.
So any wisdom is welcome
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