How many of you are terribly quiet around others?

If it’s just me and one other person, someone I know, I can talk just fine. If it’s me and two other people, I may talk a little. But when there are three or more other people present I hardly say a word, just sit there and listen to everyone else talk. When there are people I don’t know present it is the same way, regardless of how few people are there with me. I don’t like being so quiet, it holds me back socially, but I don’t think I can change it. I swear I spend more time talking to the people in my head than I do talking to real people, even though I’m around people quite a bit. I don’t count lecturing to my students; that’s an hour and twenty minutes of me talking, but not the kind of situation I’m talking about.

That’s interesting that you’re OK teaching a class of students without getting nervous. I think a lot of people are very fearful of public speaking.

What subject do you teach?

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I teach biology, part-time at a community college. I used to be terrified of public speaking, until I started teaching labs four times per week in grad school. The only way to get over the fear of public speaking is by doing it. Now it is nothing for me to do that - I just go into “teaching mode.”


Yep, I am extremely quiet, especially around others.

I am quiet around others. Its a mix of social anxiety/negative symptoms for me.

I’m OK one to one, but even then I run out of steam after about 20 minutes. As you said, more than 3 people and then I’m a "good listener ".


I really have trust issues especially when it comes to dealing with strangers.

I am quiet with others but especially with strangers or people that I don’t know too well.

I do better socially in a one on one situation.

I don’t do so well when I am socializing with more than two other people.


Happy cake day @Wave!

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Thanks @Jimbob! :slight_smile:

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I was (and am) socially awkward. I was introverted and had few friends as a youth. After a couple of breakdowns I discovered psychiatric drop-ins. It took years before I was able to successfully interact with the other members. I still find that it is taxing to enter into conversations, but I intentionally take the effort.


It’s extremely annoying for me. I’m like a mute around people. Terrible at jokes, no desire to speak about observations. I even hate to hear jokes. When I’m alone my sense of humor is totally different.

Wish I could show that “me” to people, but he always disappears. Though if I showed that me to people half his jokes would be considered just bizarre.

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I have selective mutism, I do not talk at all if I am with a group of people. It is not a problem now as I never go out to see anyone.
I am neurotic anyway, so no one in the world would ever want to be my friend.
The only time I actually do anything is when I am dreaming.


Sometimes I’m really loud and I get the feeling people get annoyed that I’m real loud. Then other times I’m quiet and they’re like “you’re so quiet” I’m like “WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME??”


When I talk one on one with someone I get very rambly sometimes. And I say very inappropriate things because there’s only so much information to pull out…

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My brain seems to go blank and I get no thoughts when I’m around a lot of people.

It happens one to one as well. But not as consistently.


I get so irritated when people feel the need to comment on how quiet on I am. One time last summer I went over my sister’s house because I wanted to talk to her about my symptoms and my new medication. There’s was someone else over when I got there, so I ended up saying hardly anything. Three times the woman who was there felt it necessary to say something about how quiet I was being. I was so irritated by the whole situation that I ended up leaving way earlier than I would have if she had not been there.


When I first started dating my most recent ex, about three years ago, I met her aunt and uncle, was over their house. My ex told me later that her uncle told her there must be something seriously wrong with me, because it is not normal for someone to be as quiet as I am. He wasn’t kidding around, either; he thought she shouldn’t be dating me. Sure, there are some things seriously wrong with me, but I still think it’s messed up that he made such comments, especially being based solely on how little I was talking.


I go mute too.

It sucks!!!

It does seem to be easier around just one person and any more than that i usually go mute.
I can get confused, overwhelmed, paranoid but also its mainly lack of education cause i forget everything which is so embaressing and my mind goes blank which makes that no words can come out.

You are educated and seem to haveremembered everything so you may not have that problem as i do.

I can not keep up in intellectual conversations not even things i learnt at primary school can i remember but im grateful for what i can do but still its noticable.

Like scoobasteve ive also had people comment on how quiet i am and they also have thought something is seriously wrong with me and also cause i might get wierd facial expressions etc and have laughed out loud.

Like totally mute and then laugh out loud. baaa

Horrid when they ask heaps of questions and i cant answer any of them and they are basic knowledge which makes me come across as super retarded and really dumb and un educated which could have its truths to it unfortunately.

I thought i might be brain damaged even but over 5 psychiatrists have diagnosed me with schizophrenia.
I would say its paranoid schizophrenia of course ive not told them of all my paranoia ive had. lol

I told my new boyfriend i go mute but i was not mute when he visited cause it was my home environment and only 2 of us and he was so easy going and nice n easy be with and around but next time we meet will be in new state and environment ive never been with and meeting his friends and family i never met before and puts me in vunreble situation .
I will not have my car or any thing.
Just me , my bag n my phone.

Ive not told anyone im going as they would say its dangerous and be negative etc
But have told some i have boyfriend and that we will be visiting each other and then maybe moving in together.

Im worried about meeting these people cause i fear i will go mute, not be able answer qustions, my memory loss of basic education may become evident and etc

It just feels so awful and there will be nowhere i can escape to.
I will have to endure which could make me psychotic.

If im in a social situation that i cant stand and i dont get my own space and be left alone i can go psychotic because it triggers me so much and upsets me so.

I wont have my own room but could maybe take out my crewchetting and say "im just going to crewchette for a while please you guys go on with your conversations and i dont mean to be rude…

His parents and friends might be horrified by my behaviour n mutism etc and say im a bad bad abd girlfriend and a wierdo. lol

But am as am.

And i love me.:heart:


I get the same way around family members and strangers. I rarely say much at all. It’s so weird and I don’t know why. On the other hand, I talk some at group (3 days a week). I think I talk more there than I do when I’m around family members. I’m also more comfortable around my group members.

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I have persistent alogia. This is an issue for me literally every day. I can’t speak fluently. It never gets better.