A taxi driver talks about an accident. I listen to him but soon i start asking myself, why can’t i see him as a person, a human?
An old lady starts telling me about his daughter wedding. Apparently she moved to another city. However i don’t care. I’m waiting for my train, that’s all.
My grandparents speak about the future. They are old, so they willl be dead soon. I can only think about going back to my room and listen to music.
Things feels so artificial, fake and surreal sometimes. I don’t know how to treat others. I don’t know what it means to have a connection, to be human and treat others like it.
Even this post feels surreal and pointless. Dosent feel real at all
Don’t know. Not caring about anything could be a sign of depression. Your symptoms could be negative symptoms as well. Have you talked to your pdoc about this?
Everyone has to screen the conversations they get into to see if they should get more involved. Some people are better at listening. Some aren’t. If someone really wants conversation you might indulge them, but you’d better be ready for them to chew on your ear. But it is a gracious act to listen, but if you brush people off it’s no crime. Much of the time someone might be trying to play you - to distract your attention so someone can pick your pocket, or something like that.
Do you feel its negative symptoms.
a seeming lack of interest in the world, not wanting to interact with other people (social withdrawal)
The occur in both SZ, other Severe Mental Disorders including Major Depression. For me I’m down to just my husband and the internet folks. i am almost completely withdrawn. From normal human interaction. It’s bad and I am seeking help - or help is trying to help me at all cost.
Anyway I don’t really treat them any way because I’m kind of a hermit. I’m polite to the people I come into contact to whenever I can though.
When I was dealing with psychosis, I ended up in a shopping center I didn’t recognize and my phone battery had died. I needed to borrow a cell phone for a quick call to my stepdad to get picked up but NOBODY would let me use their phone. Everyone told me the same lie, “my phone’s batteries are dead.” I even walked up to a table of folks eating, six of them, all of them said their phones were dead. Right. I learned on that night that people don’t care about you unless they are family. Fortunately a teenager finally let me use his phone, I was on it for 2 minutes then gave it back and thanked him profusely. Thank goodness for the rare kind people in this world.
To be honest my view of others borders on condescending. Well meaning but condescending. I see people as generally well-meaning animals with poor insight and decision making skills that are deserving of endless patience and compassion because with love people can flourish into beings capable of absolutely amazing things. And i just have a general love for living beings and know how hard it is to be a human or just alive at all so I do my best to give everyone grace. I just need to stop seeing others as children i need to guide and protect and even at times manipulate for their own good. It’s not nice. And it means I have very very little trust for other people as well which can be lonely.
That happened to my boss. She had just bought $600 worth of Xmas gifts. Someone in line started talking to her which took her eyes off her purchase. So next thing you know all her Xmas presents were gone.