How do I deal with perceived rejection? How do I get more resilient?

[Pikasaur]

I say perceived because quite often, the feeling is in my head. Someone uses a slightly less patient tone than usual, someone’s wording is slightly more passive agressive, maybe someone even gets frustrated with me over something.

I take it as rejection.

I’ve stopped lashing out at people, but instead I shut down and have ill thoughts about myself and whether or not I even deserve a place in the world if I’m really so unloveable.
Just reading what I just typed makes me feel like despite my age, 30, I’m still just some emo tween.

I feel so dumb for being so dependent on the people I like liking me, and I know just because someone is in a mood or doesn’t speak the same way they normally do, doesn’t mean they hate me or are getting sick of me. But then why does my brain keep telling me that’s the case?
Why am I ready to cry or run away whenever someone takes a harsh tone with me?

How can I get more resilient?

[anon61987434]

I have the same issue, I feel so sensitive.

[Mr_Hope]

I think it helps to stay in touch with reality. Forget about what tv and media tells you the world should be like, and go wih your instincts.

I had a phase when I thought the ideal world was like the sitcom “friends” and that everyone was striving to make it so. I think people looked at me like a freak because I was too altruistic.

Anyways the best strategy is to be yourself I found. Really listen when other people talk because that sets you up with a good response and there will be less fricton.