So as this is my first post on here I firstly just want to say hi, and hope everyone is doing guuud! Normally speaking, talking about myself is not something I like to do (haha) as It feels selfish, but I have yet to talk to anyone else that also suffers from paranoid schizophrenia. Currently I have been taking medication for a number of years, Quetiapine @ 600mg. Is o.k. apart from the time it takes to get up, even after so long, although I can’t complain as it is its only negative I feel. Generally, I seem to have more visual hallucinations compared to audio. Not always nice if I’m totally honest, but you do get used to it some what.
Anyways, I wanted to ask you guys and gals a question. If you were diagnosd with paranoid schizophrenia, at that time of diagnosis how did that make you feel? Was there a part of you that rejected it? I only ask as I found it very difficult to accept. I remeber coming home feeling I let poeple down, also I found myself thinking my life was never going to be the same.
But I hope you all enjoy your evening even if it is 1:30am haha
I was dx’d bipolar and initially rejected. The only thing that led to my acceptance was being put into the hospital multiple times after my original dx.
When I was given my diagnosis… I was 17 and I could accept that I wasn’t doing well… but I didn’t really know what the diagnosis truly added up to. Just because I was diagnosed with it didn’t mean I knew anything about it.
I did reject most of the treatment in my life… thinking that I my not know Sz… but I know my mind better then anyone… (which I find isn’t true since my brain has been rewiring it’s self all the time)
I think I could deal with the word Schizophrenia… but the reality that I needed help. That part I didn’t accept. It took a long time for me to accept that I needed help… when I did that… I got help.
The way I’ve been looking at it lately… yes… your life is on a detour… but if you keep going you’ll get back on track. There are people with this illness who have jobs they like… have spouses and children… it takes a bit of different coping to get there… but people do get there.
You didn’t let anyone down by becoming Sz… if you take care of yourself and try to stay healthy and work with your doc… You won’t be letting anyone down.
I totally could not accept it and didn’t want to believe it. I thought I was just like everyone else and couldn’t possibly be ill. Time proved otherwise.
Welcome to the forums! When I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, I had mixed feelings. Part of me was depressed while another part of me was glad to know there was a name for what was happening with me.
By the way, I encourage you to say what ever you want/need to say on these forums. This is a great place to talk about things. Cheers!
hi, welcome to forum and I am also new to this forum and paranoid sz. But I am doing well with the medication, pls go through my profile for medication and period of unusual thought I have. Apart from that I am doing ok now.
I find people here are very kind and supportive because we understand our suffering better then so called normal people in society.
Actually I left house due to day to day heated argument with my wife (it was 12 year of suffering) and I was in one room rented place for six month alone (Jan 2011-June2011, in UK). Suddenly I find some changes in myself due to these stress, I had illusion that I have some supernatural power, and people around me, on roads, different color of cars, songs, music, birds, shapes of tree and cloud, rains, sun brightness giving me signals to solve the world wide problem like poverty, racial discrimination, water and energy shortage problem, religious fight, terrorism, environmental ecological problem-global warming, child labour, corruption . Whether I was in room or walking on roads, I was picking those signal and writing all the thoughts in word file on my pc or felt that people directly understand my thoughts and taking a solution from my brain. I felt that everybody watching me 24 hours through spy camera, whether I was writing, taking bath, sleeping etc. I had occasionally auditory hallucination and no visual hallucination. Later on after taking medicine and hospitalization I realized that I was actually unwell and I was wandering how come I had these thoughts. Doctor said that I have delusional disorder and later on in Dec 2012 doctor said it is paranoid sz in India. These thing happed only for one month (June 2011 in united kingdom) and two week (dec2012, India), apart from these from this I am perfectly well and never experienced such thing again in my life.
Now I am running my own business and it is going well. I do hard work from 8.30 am to 9.30pm. I do take 1-2 hour rest in afternoon.
Whenever I get time I utilised my time to read good books in my shop. All this positive development happens to me after I started my own work/business. like working hard, buying of items from wholesaler and selling to customer, arrangement of items in racks and showcase, maintenance of log book, accounting, cleaning of shops daily morning, I am doing by my own. Personal habit like reading good books, keeping my cloths and room clean and getting up in morning and daily bath also become a regular habit for me now.
But when I was not working(March 2013-Dec2014) then I was not keeping myself clean and was going for walking in evening for one hours. rest of the time I was just killing my time watching tv only. I was not interested in book reading and any other socializing.
But when I have taken the personal decision to start my own business then it changes everything for me. Now I am again hopeful for life, and it is giving me sense it I am also worth for society and above all I will not depend on others. Lets see how it goes.
Friends I need your encouragement and moral support. Because you understand me better and I can also feel your suffering from my heart. Feel free to interact with me. I will reply to your post and reply, whenever I will be free.
regards
Dr. Sidgift
Let me just express my gratitude for all these responses! I was not sure I would get any but thanks! I think personally when I got diganosed I had for so many years told doctors that I wasn’t a paranoid sz that it hit me really hard.
In the past it stopped me from going to lectures at Uni to which I had to finally leave, that was really difficult, as I was not diagnosed at that time. It was a really big issue as I felt I should have finished. But now I have had the opportunity to study again which I now do at home. In addition changing subject as Psychology counselling was a little to close to home.
Again thanks to all of you beautiful people, it was really hard writing about this as I have told only two people of my “illness”, but it was nice to hear some warm words…
Hey 8 - welcome. I had been ill for years before I ever got diagnosed so when I was I accepted it. This diagnosis began to explain all the ■■■■ that was going on.
Hope you have a good time on this forum. It is the best
I was first diagnosed with psychotic disorder and borderline personality disorder. I didn’t believe it. I was convinced to go into dbt. Then I realized I was sick. Of course my diagnosis has changed since then. I am now diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. My dad and my aunt both deny their illnesses and refuse meds. I have promised myself that I won’t be like them.
