Have You Experienced Dissociation?
I have a friend that did for a couple of years…maybe three but hasn’t had it happen in probably 6 years. She’s not on any meds or anything.
Yes, lots and lots of it.
Not sure what qualifies as dissociation or if I even remember if you were to lay it out for me. But I have experienced derealization and have it pointed out to me.
I guess so, that’s what I keep getting told.
Do I buy it? not really.
Hate it when others hint about loosing time? What time?
recently diagnosed with Dissociative personality disorder!
its not fun, especially with people telling me I’ve probably had it since I was 12 or 13…and that my biggest regret, and the one thing I can never forgive myself for, was probably a result of the docs not knowing/wanting to diagnose what I had…
if I had been diagnosed properly, I would have never done it, the doctors failed, one way or another they failed me…
Lose time means I am at my house making lunch
Now I’m in this weird parking lot and it’s 4pm
as consecutive moments without transition. When I find my way home, lunch has not been eaten
Count yourself lucky that you get to keep all your time
Mine never lasted longer than a few hours and have greatly diminished in length and frequency. Some people’s last days. Most people who have this wind up doing things we don’t remember, but other people do remember and tell us about.
Time is as irrelevant as reality.
I have a very hard time with keeping track of time…always have, last night I went into Sam’s Club around 4PM, just to get a free cupcake, and when I walked outside, it was dark, and they were closed. I had spent over 4.5 hours in there…doing what? only came home with a few things…
No wonder they kept giving me the stink eye, I was the last one out.
Stores are a big time suck for me, I tend to wander endlessly with a look of awe on my face, trying to figure out when all these new flavors, shapes and products came out. I’m in there so long it draws negative attention to me from the employees who follow me around thinking I’m a thief? I just touch every single thing in response while asking them stupid questions until they give up.
My (ex) husband banned me from going into book stores.
I spent so much time in one, when I got home he was in the process of filing a missing person’s report on me…(this was before cell phones). Don’t think I didn’t feel a bit dumb.
My family and past few pdocs kept referring to the fact that I “Lost time” but it makes me feel weird when they say this.
Don’t know why.
I find things done around the house, that I don’t recall doing- like 4 (not) complete sets of files for the household bills and important papers…I can understand 2 maybe…but 4?
Then there’s handwriting I don’t recognize that replaces mine in my little pocket notebooks.
Strangers will come across as “too friendly” like a life long friend…and wonder why don’t recognize them.
When I’m not hypervigilent I’m dissociative. Dichotomous brain!
yes! the real deal. moving and talking without knowing who is saying what and blacking in and out of understanding. my vision would fade to a pastel blur and sometimes go black completely. my shrink said it was neurological, not psychiatric. I also have Wilson’s Disease.
That sucks. I’m sorry to hear that.
yeah. no kidding. well, the Wilson’s Disease damage has healed by now, I think. I used to need, ballparking it, three times as much antipsychotic. but the . . . oh, you’ll be better someday. go peddle hope elsewhere, right?
And I was just off in another thread alluding to such things as Wilson’s, neglecting to think that just maybe someone around these parts is suffering from such things. Copper be damned. Too much science in my head. Too much understanding from too little words spoken. Brain implosion impending.
Your attitude is a testimony to your strength and courage. You rockwell!
Stop it. When I want emotional support, I’ll manipulate it from you.
I have pretty intense bouts of depersonalization. Like arguing with my reflection and having to keep time in front of the bathroom mirror dosed out.
I “pieces” of my life that were forgotten in a fracture of some sort only to come back years and at times decades later. Have I ever been doing something and then found myself hours later somewhere else? No. But I believe there is evidence of a form of dissociation from these memories that I’m even still to this day occasionally come back to me. The problem is, a lot of it either includes completely unrealistic phenomena (according do modern belief) or contradicts the timeline of my life or another memory (as in I’m remembering living in two places in the same time period neither of which I lived most of my life with any knowledge of)
Some are more mundane like last night I remembered meeting at night at the baseball bleachers with people I can’t place, no idea who they are, just girls with faces I can’t see. I can remember sitting in the bleachers and I’m obviously out of my gourd high on something but there’s a girl sitting next to me who I suspect might be an old friend/acquaintance.
The thing is, in my teens I WAS asked questions about things I had no memory of, one, the girl I think is sitting next to me, claimed I’d introduced her to the Violent Femmes, a band I (to my mind) only became aware of when my band played “Blister in the Sun” for a talent show this being their only song I knew, no she said, I was really into them.
A lot of these fractured memories have me on drugs at the time, but they go back all my life into early childhood where drugs obviously aren’t being done. I believe trauma has a lot to do with it and there’s other things, there’s so much more to this that I feel I’ll probably never figure out my life.
I recently after spending time with an old high school friend for the first time in over ten years asked him about what he always described at the time “when you used to do coke” and his face immediately became painfully contorted but he dodged the question claiming ignorance. It’s like there’s people who know that my life’s been a hell of a lot more interesting than I originally remembered it being, like everyone who ever knew me, but it’s like I can’t be informed, I’m to be told it’s all delusion or simply didn’t happen. Some of these people I’m not going to approach with the subject because I’m in my 30’s and feel silly talking about it or they have families and professional careers and probably don’t want to talk about contriversial ancient history on Facebook, so I’ve left it alone.
I saw a film once when I was 17 back when I was watching the Sundance channel and old school IFC a lot. It was about a man who lived as a shut-in tennant of an apartment building in NYC, he was agoraphobic and couldn’t go outside the building. His hobby was building model bridges with a soldering iron out of metal. It turned out in the end that his landlord was actually his ex wife and that the building was actually his and he’d been a successful architect until his wife did something to him to black out his mind and make him forget everything about his life.
I sometimes feel like this guy and sometimes suspect I kind of am in a way.
So you know the love of bookstores. I used to love them too.
The doctor dxed my dissociation because it was difficult for me and I was scared, but if it hadn’t been distressing and caused problems, I might not have worried about it.
If other people are telling you you “lost time,” I honestly have no advice because it took me years to notice that this was happening to me and not until it became really stark did I start to become concerned and told my doctor. Even with the dx it took me years to take in the information and start to observe what was happening, which is impossible to observe directly (because I am not there for it)
My dissociated state is really creepy, I basically lose all emotion and empathy, and feel like a sock puppet psychopath.