Has anyone here had a casual relationship?

Yesterday I had a date. I didn’t see him that way so I said I wasn’t interested in a relationship so we agreed to have a casual thing but as the day went on today, he kept pushing me to meet him today. Kept telling me I was trying to make excuses not to. I am not going to be pressured into having sex with someone. He said ‘it looks like you’re looking for a bad guy instead of a decent guy like me’… wtf? I told him he wasn’t decent. No decent guy pushes a girl to go out and have sex with him when she doesn’t want to.


With time I have realised i am not ready for a relationship per se but i wouldn’t mind something casual…

What’s a casual relationship? Just friends you mean?

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No. Just meeting to have sex.

I think they call that ‘a friend with benefits’.

The answer is simple: do you like him? Do you feel attracted to him? If so, then give the lad a chance :slight_smile:
Otherwise move on, the pond is full of fish, you’ll catch another one soon :slight_smile:
Just my two cents.

That in turn will make you want a relationship with them anyway.

Well I am meeting up with this other guy. He wants casual too but if we both want to we can let it develop into something more… lets see on Sunday


Who wouldn’t be down for casual …
Lol… what sex with no strings attached and I don’t have to pay … that’d awesome sign me up lol…

I’ve had casuals before but I tended to feel physically amazing but mentally dirty afterwards and felt like I was an ■■■■■■■ for using the girl. But I guess she probably used me too huh… le sigh.

Casual is the best though especially when you don’t have to call and talk to her afterwards when you have absolutely nothing to say other then hey wanna do that again?

Yes I have.

Once. We hooked up one night, what may be the one time I was the one who pursued and it worked. We agreed that we didn’t want anything serious or too committed but we were both in pain at the time, I was like a wounded freaking puppy, so we decided we’d both give of ourselves what we could spare.

She later came to me and asked if she could be with someone else for a while, someone she had unfinished business with and I told her I appreciated her honesty so much that yes, she could. I mean it was pretty casual, but she wanted to be pushed around which I’m either not that way at all or in rare moments too intense for weaker personalities. She came back to me after she ended it with this other guy and she was like, that wasn’t what I wanted either.

We’d hook up now and then talked on the phone for a few years after that ended but last I talked to her was a voicemail wishing her merry christmas. She’s an email away but I fear saying the wrong thing or screwing it up so I don’t dare talk to her. After she came back to me from this other guy (who had no idea I knew the whole time) she was like “who were you with” and I was like “my bowl babe…just my bowl” and I think she felt some guilt about that.

But we always managed to keep it casual but almost like free love without the actual love…like I showed up to her house in a breakdown after driving 14 hours one night and cried all the next day and she just held me and read me poetry. Then I blew a ton of adderal and ended up in her basement developing a psych profile on her roomates boyfriend. We agreed to part ways the next day on good terms despite my behavior and our ensuing fight.

Jeeze this doesn’t sound casual at all. In fact I’ve had more casual relationships than this. I’m not the hook up one night stand type, nor do I get anywhere with the sort who develops no attachment nor identifies any real emotions with sexual relationships. I was in a relationship pretty young so this was kind of where I was comfortable and I’ve got some kind of history of abuse/trauma so…

Yeah anyway these days I’d love something casual since an actual relationship might be suicide for the other half of that relationship. I just…sex is something very personal for me whether it’s casual or not, it’s something private, though I’ve pushed those limits before. It’s also something I vaguely remember and the last nitwit I recently dated, for all I know it would take someone with some patience and understanding to get happening again after what I’ve been through the past several years.

Here we go being way too open on the god damn internet.

I hate myself.

Never been able to perform during casual relationships.

I don’t think it’s a good idea to get involved in a casual relationship. Guys will have sex for any reason as long as the girl is willing but you might develop feelings in time. Unless there is no attraction whatsoever. But i am like that, i get emotionally attached easily.


Booyah Kasha. It got old though.
Sometimes I like sex and other times I really don’t care for it. I’m a bit odd that way

I think it is healthy and good that you won’t let yourself be pressured into sex, but you are mistaken if you don’t think a lot of guys pressure girls to have sex with them. That happens fairly often. Personally, I’ve had one night stands before, though we didn’t meet at a bar. We both knew what we expected of the other, and we were okay with casual sex. Another time I was talking to this girl in my room, and she told me, “I don’t want to talk, I just want to ■■■■.” I declined. She was too eager. It scares a lot of guys off when a girl tells them flat out that they want sex.

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I resent that remark actually. My first relationship was with someone who was pathologically unfaithful and I say that as she continued to be in her next relationship after we were done. I had so many opportunites, I had the braver girls (this was no one you wanted to mess with) throwing themselves at me. I spent a night drinking beer when she was off having one of her “affairs” with a friend of ours sitting on my lap, showing me her piercings, talking about sex. And you know what? That’s it, that’s as far as I went in straying from her.

I can honestly say I’m a monogymous male. That said I kind of agree with you, but then I’ve known women who’d sleep with just about anyone. It’s not just men, and I resent being stereotyped in any way, but lumped in with “Men are all like this” is insulting.

I never intend to insult anyone at all. But from my own experience, guys just like to have sex more especially with anyone. Im not saying girls are different but me personally i can not just have sex without loving someone first or liking someone enough. :v:


Had exactly this. I was seeing a real pretty girl who would go on all the time about ■■■■■■■. Kinda freaked me out.

In your youth I say sure, why not? Just don’t bop a guy because he meets you though. Some couples kind of make an agreement that you want to just talk and go out with the guy for two weeks prior to any consideration that you have sex?

I don’t do anything anymore. I’m a relationship guy, was from the beginning, I confuse people too much without knowing it who might be willing to just have a hook up or two. Too affectionate, too lovey dovey I guess. Saw a therapist who screwed me up big time who threatened me unless I kept going to her appointments. Never bought a thing she said but was smoking so much pot aside from whatever she did to me that it was all over for a while. I tied what she was basically saying to a few utterances from people I knew in my mid teens in response to which I remember saying “Has you’re uncle been listening to Rush Limbaugh by any chance?”\

Nothing to do with retarded ■■■■, which put a bunch of “people” together and you’ll pretty much end up with. I don’t know what I’m saying. I guess I’m saying…I’m not comfortable just hooking up certain people, as an empath I feel it out. There are people I thought I just hooked up with who I more recently learned have been unable to get me off their minds in the decade + since. I don’t know. I guess I’m celebate now…it’s been long enough. Had the chance with this nitwit 21 yearold but couldn’t

I wish people weren’t such a way that made me hate them. I don’t hate easily, maybe it’s not people I hate, it’s probably not. I guess I’m just a relationship guy who can’t make a relationship last because they all happen to either lose their minds, get harrassed on the internet, or even get served false legal documents or at worst driven to suicide or convinced into nearly killing us both at the very luckiest and I was just kissing buddies with that last one.

When a man sees a pretty girl, sex will cross his mind.