Feeling left out is not just an sz thing. I spent most of my life feeling this way. Eating alone at school. Never a part of a group. I always felt like I was missing out on what was really going on. To compensate I read novels all the time. Sometimes one a day.
I was too out of my head to feel left out. I always had company at the lunch table itās just you couldnāt see them. I always had someone to talk to as a kid and a teen. Then when I was in high school, I was too busy to deal with other people. I had kidnappers to thwart and plans to make and traps to set and youngsters to educate. Other people at the lunch table were taking my space, and distracting me from my primary task of kidnapper hunting.
My sis is not SZ and she is at the height of feeling left out. Sheās really feeling like she just doesnāt fit anywhere and sheās been in a bit of a deep mope. Especially since sheās been finding out that sheās in her high school in name only. Running Start has her taking her classes on a college campus. So she has no connection to her high school friends and is too young to connect with the college peopleā¦
Sheās been going to the Senior Center more to talk to the āyoung at heartā 80 year olds. My 17 year old sis fit in with the seniors. Donāt even get me started on the 83 year old long retired Arthur Murry Dance instructor who she thinks is a suave and interesting man.
If she brings him home for dinner our parents are going to freakā¦ 
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I am not sure āleft outā is the right phrase as much as feeling iām on the outside looking in and never/seldom part of the inner circle.
I often struggle for things to contribute and knowing when to input into the conversation.
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Yes support groups are usually actually people with mental illnesses, not people trolling. I would be able to spot a troll, and that would be one hardcore troll driving all the way out there, making up a story and doing well not to laugh the whole time. Itās improbable and maybe implausible. Groups are great as long as one person doesnāt dominate the discussion, I find. Itās best when everyone gets a chance to talk as long as they need to.
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All the time. This is the information age. People have developed a sense of humor at knowing things others donāt. I never understand what people are talking aboutā¦ Iām a man on an island. And I kinda like it like thatā¦
Iāve felt left out all my life!! LOL I have social anxiety and depression when i was a teen and in my twenties before i hallucinated. Iāve now isolated myself so much so i wonāt get hurt anymore that now i am a total hermit. 
my social life is just posting crap online.
Iāve decided to just focus on things i enjoy instead of making friends. itās easier that way. 
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That pretty much sums it up for me apart from a weekly group run by the rehab team. If i wasnāt posting online i would spend more time watching dross on the tv or escaping under the duvet.
If the socialisation problems were going to improve to the point of having a small circle of friends it would have happened by now.
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Most groups have a facilitator so there is a person to keep the trolls out.
One group I was in there was an old lady who would knit and sit quietly. Her ride always came late to pick her up from the last activity. What are we going to doā¦ Make an 80 year old lady sit outside in the rain? She was actually very sweet. She didnāt have SZ but she tragically lost her husband to dementia. She knitted me and two others guys a hat.
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i think that ur only as left out as u make urself. if u donāt try and engage then ull always b left out. i know itās difficult but u have to try. i find it difficult too but i try anyway. itās always a nice surprise if some one invites u out for a drink or a cup of tea. if it happens then go. try and b sociable. i havenāt been the best at accepting invitations lately but iām going to try harder from now on. friendships r like plantsā¦if u donāt take care of them, they wither and die, so try ur hardest to get out there.
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I have a best friend that I feel comfortable around. Social situations are different. I experience a different level of awareness and everyone alienates me from the group āexperienceā. When I engage it makes it worse. There is something that I donāt understand. It is easy for you to say to me that Iām only as left out as I make myself feel because youāre not experiencing what I experience seeing what I see. The group dynamic that occurs works well when I am at a distance. Once I enter the situation it gets thrown out of whack ā¦ People form patterns in the way they stand and talk in metaphorical language.
I tend to be a black hole that sucks all the energy from people Iām with. I hate that about myself.
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R u sure that itās rEal and not paranoid thinking? Even normal people experience social anxiety and it may just b their way of coping with their own anxiety. Would u feel the same if it was us in a group?
That is very much the case. Shut mouthās donāt get fed. For me being social comes and goes. I go through a period of being OK to ask and talk and be open, then I get paranoid that Iāve said too much, Iāve offended someone and then my head tries to convince me that they only asked me out to be nice and they donāt want me to come.
I"m trying to fight that last part better.
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I tried for a couple of years - talked to people but I still didnāt connect - with them or myself. I was pretty much an airhead with words coming out. And it was painful also - to play the part + not really be there.
I do admit there are times I talking with someone and then I can sort of see the confused look in their eye and they start backing away. I can sort of hear myself not making sense anymore. I hate that. But I donāt chase them like I use to. :running:
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I am not sure how much is the disease and how much of it is my own personality. I feel left out a lot. Especially since I came out and told someone that I have schizoaffective disorder. Everyone makes their excuses and ends up heading away as soon as possible like I have a catchy disease.
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