Hallucinations getting worse

Hi all, I am new here. I’ve been to therapy almost all my life, it’s been hard for me to trust therapists to be entirely forthcoming about what’s happening.

I have mentioned my hallucinations before, they’re typically visual but some auditory. I was put on anti-psych meds and those really made me like a zombie. Like I had no creativity.

I’ve had these symptoms since my early teens, including lack of affect, issues expressing myself, disorganized thoughts I’m easily distracted while talking. I confuse others, and others confuse me. I don’t like new people, they make me inexplicably nervous…I have some paranoid thoughts about people having ulterior motives but I’ve been in abusive friendships before so that might be because of how I was treated.

I have PTSD/C-PTSD and DID but lately I’ve been wondering with my symptoms and worsening aggression lately due to a diet change/stressors I think of my hallucinations.

I see shadows, usually they follow me and kind of stare, blood, dead things, as bad as it sounds it’s been manageable. After increased stress and stuff last weekend one of them attacked me and hissed and then the next day I was surrounded by shadows in the dark. I’m actually afraid of the dark now…

I don’t know if this is criteria for schizophrenia but I had been told it was a possibility. I can’t afford a therapist and I don’t really trust them anymore…I guess I’m seeing if the possibility is accurate and maybe I can find help in supplements and reaching common ground here somehow.

Are you on meds? Seeing a psychiatrist?

Some tips on getting free therapy. Even mention of Grow a 12 step program. For alternative treatment. I hope it helps.

Welcome to the forum!

I am not on medicine or seeing a psychiatrist. Thanks for the link.

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May I ask how old you are? (Because it makes a difference.)

It sounds like either bipolar with psychotic / paranoid delusions or the onset of actual sz, both of which can be diminished (often without severe clamping down on “creativity”) with sensitive use of anti-Ps and possibly mood levelers. One has to understand, however, that the anti-Ps are often very “compressive” during the first few days or weeks of application. I always experienced that when I went back on meds after a few weeks of being off of them (for psychotic bipolar).

If $$$ is an issue, I would get as educated as possible on the cheap before trapesing very far into the maze of professional psychiatry and psychotherapy, so long as you at least get some medicinal stabilization… and the earlier the better, so the research shows. This website is a very good place to start. I would also invest in a copy of this book: http://www.amazon.com/Surviving-Schizophrenia-6th-Edition-Family/dp/0062268856… because it’s probably the best single primer and resource guide available right now.

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I’m in my late 20s. This all started getting really bad a few years ago. I do not have bipolar disorder, I’ve already been tested for that and I have no depression or manic cycling. Low dose Mood stabilizers and/or anti-psychotics have given me bad side effects so I’m hesitant to try them again, been on a few. I was hoping to try supplements first before going back to a therapist and getting put on meds.

I will definitely check out that book, thank you.


Most meds have side effects. At least in the beginning.

Given the rundown you started this thread with, I’d have to say that’s pretty unlikely… and even potentially dangerous.

@Comatose is right. The sfx tend to lessen as your body adjusts to the meds. I was doing fine on a pretty stiff dose of Seroquel a few years ago… and I did enough psychotherapy – including the mindfulness variety – for my very intense C-PTSD that my dosage has been steadily reduced.

I wasted a lot of time in “half-measures” and “negotiation” before winding up in the hospital eleven times, including twice in the ICU with tubes going into and coming out of pretty much everywhere before I was transferred up to the psych lockup.

I’m aware but some side effects are worse than others and one of the medicines made me extremely sick. That’s why I’m cautious.

I WILL get professional help when I can afford it but right now I cannot, but right now I’m doing the best I can.

Are you on disability now? Got MediCare or even MediMedi? (Or even MediMediMedi?) If you’re as compromised as you’re describing, find a friend or family member to help you through the state and federal processes. You will thank me and yourself for this in time, I can guarantee you.

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I have insurance, I’m just being cautious about proceeding with a professional, part because of money, part because I have issues trusting them. My fiancé is with me and helping me. He is helping me keep track of stuff that happens as well.

It’s often a grind finding a caregiver team that’s not so stressed they act like either banshees or robots. Ya know, you might want to use this link to come at it from the opposite direction (meaning via a very sophisticated therapist working backwards toward competent and caring medical help).

DBT is The Most Sophisticated major, non-medicinal therapy for this stuff right now.


I have heard of DBT. Looking at this list there’s a clinic near me so that’s really good to know. I’ll call them very soon. Thank you.

Welcome to the forum and good luck in your search.