I’ve felt like a mess the last couple days. Crazy crazy thoughts. Wanting to drink. Scared of living in a sober apartment. I have a hangover when I wake up from guilt. A guilt hangover. But I’m doing everything right. Got a sponsor I can call everyday and feel comfortable. Trying to raise my meds. Feeling a little better now. But head is still a little disheveled.
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Got 20 days to get completely stable again. And can’t afford a relapse in that time.
Moved to DX’d - Other
Sorry your head is fuzzy, it’s maybe the stress of moving getting to you
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@turningthepage I suspect some of what you’re experiencing may be due to jitters about moving across country and starting school. Both are big steps in your life. With that said, definitely keep your pdoc aware as to what’s going on so they can help you deal with your symptoms and come up with a plan for the uptick in stress in your life currently.
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Part of it is I’ve been feeling hopeless lately…like I’ve been second guessing being a therapist and I just don’t see any point 
but I’m doing better with that notion today. I want to be a therapist again and haven’t craved at all yet today but still have a guilt hangover.
My mom says its depression…like I see people working stupid jobs. I don’t want to be a jones. I had this fantasy of being the next hunter s Thompson yesterday but that’s just stupid…
There’s no point in feeling guilty about cravings, if you caved in it would be a different story, cravings are natural to have in our situation.
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I try writing stories about my life story and it just triggers me cuz it ends up being all about substance use. I need to stop doing that and take life for what it is and accept the things I can’t change.
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Yes, I’ve felt that way too. I tried writting about my traumas, ended up completely triggered and miserable. Sometimes there’s no point, just do it when you reach that stage where you feel it will be okay.
You’re doing great man, just don’t try to do it all at once. One thing at a time, also works 
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I hope this passes and you’re feeling better soon. Just take things a minute at a time and have hope that the next minute might be better than the last.
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I just called a guy from aa and left a message. Made me feel so much better 
@turningthepage Do you have a new Pdoc and Tdoc all set up in Olympia yet? Maybe you mentioned it somewhere and I missed it.
Nope. Still working on finding a Medicare doctor. If I don’t I will apply for Medicaid when I get there and join this clinic…that gives you a pdoc, therapist and case worker…I will go out there with three month supply of meds though.
Good. So you have a plan. That’s great.
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How’s school going for you? Do you start today?
I haven’t started yet. The 19th. Paying tuition tomorrow. Waiting to get into my math class. I am first on the waiting list so I am hopeful. Scared about finding my way around, lol. My son laughs at me. He goes to the University of Washington which is 10 times the size of my CC. I am still nervous though. I better figure it out because I am planning to transfer to the UW in 2 years.
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The huskies huh? Huskies is our state college mascot, now I’m moving to another place, the land of the huskies. Can’t escape the huskies!
Huskies, Seahawks and Mariners:) Welcome
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Maybe I will root for those teams but could never give up my fandom to the jets, uconn, Yankees, nets and Rangers. Too bad you lost the supersonics…that was like a decade ago…can’t believe it 
I always liked gonzaga basketball too
Was it that long ago? Wow. I’m a fan because of logistics but I don’t pay much attention to sports TBH. When I was married I did but not so much anymore. I’m a bandwagoner if we’re doing well:)
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