Feeling deflated and low

[anon70282812]

Im deflated and low

I cant do anything about this mess just have to carry on living through it

The builders are starting on roof repairs next week and the kids are playing out nearly everyday making noise a lot

I feel anxious and on edge just in a fog of existence, somebody cares my husband but nothing bothers him as much

[anon70282812]

I dont feel real id be better off #### sorry

I feel detached from my soul i feel bad

[signless]

Hope u feel better ducky

[anon70282812]

I just dont know how to fix my life its a mess

[2Waynez]

A common symptom of schizophrenia is feeling negative. Don’t let the disease win. Can’t you see a therapist to work through things? I’m not upbeat everyday. I’m neutral. When I’m really out of it for months and can’t take it anymore I just go to the psych ward. I have voices, delusions, and hallucinations. Negative thoughts enter my mind but I don’t entertain them. I replace them with a more neutral thought. I stay busy. If I’m low I get to work doing things then when I’m done doing things I’m thankful to rest. If I just lay around schizophrenia dictates that I’m gonna have negativity because it’s a common symptom of schizophrenia. I have to push to do things, my medicine makes me lethargic. I’m not a victim, I’m a survivor. There’s a difference. I know you’ve had this problem for awhile. Have you been doing anything different since the last time you had an episode like this? If not the problem will continue to beat you down. I think with schizophrenia the good days and bad days a normal person gets is more pronounced with schizophrenia. They don’t teach you in school any life philosophy they just teach you to be useful. People are complex. It might take a long time to look at things from a more neutral perspective. I emphasize not happy or sad because these are extremes.

[Ninjastar]

@anon70282812

I cant do anything

When I feel this way, I get overwhelmed and my brain turns off. What I’ve learned is that I have trouble visualizing a “finished” version of a situation. Since I can’t clearly see the goal, I can’t see the steps to get there. I feel trapped and hopeless. Learning how to visualize the goal helps me figure out the steps to get there.

Is it your entire life, or specific parts that are distressing?

[anon70282812]

I feel so selfish i know there are always people suffering and worse off than me. Im so depressed though i just want to escape this hellish life im still youngish not too old anyway. I just want a life where i can work and meet people without schizophrenia and anxiety and pd. I just want my life to be better than this

[2Waynez]

My mom has kidney disease. She’s getting older. I think about life without her sometimes. It’s hard to imagine, but it is reality. I accept it but I don’t agree with it. I try to joke around with her and make her happy. I don’t want to spend the years I have left with my mom rehearsing her future suffering over and over in my head. When the time comes I will be heartbroken and life permits that I will continue living if that’s in life’s cards. I’ve seen a lot of injustice in my life. I saw a woman who rarely worked, hooked on meth, shooting out babies, losing her house and custody of her kids, find a good man and win $500,000 in the lottery. My cousin who is a good man works hard, makes good money and has problems with dating women who are bad for him and he’s riddled with problems. The more I live i see that life can not make sense at times and things can be unfair sometimes..This doesn’t mean I stop living my life trying to make the best of a bad situation..

[Catman]

I find it helpful to have a planner and break things down into small, manageable pieces. The more specific I am the better. Otherwise I get overwhelmed with anxiety.

I hope you feel better soon.

[Ninjastar]

@anon70282812

I feel so selfish i know there are always people suffering and worse off than me. Im so depressed though

There is a thing I do sometimes. I wonder if you do it too. I feel like I’m being selfish/ungrateful to complain about my life because it’s really not THAT bad. But then my mood keeps getting worse and worse because my brain needs that release. It subconsciously make me worse and worse to see if I have finally met my own standard for “deserves to feel sad.” I try to consciously remind myself that it is acceptable to be upset regardless of anyone else’s perspective. That sometimes cuts off the endless cycle.

[anon70282812]

Im sorry your mums sick @2Waynez and credit to you for supporting her

@Catman i do have a routine

@Ninjastar i have borderline pd and i guess this is part of it. Sudden suicidal impulses, mood shifts i cant help being like this its just how i struggle through life. A big problem is numb and feeling detached from myself. I dont think theres many people here who have borderline? Im sorry i shared so much negativity, thanks for helping me through it everyone who replied

[Ninjastar]

@anon70282812

I dont think theres many people here who have borderline?

A couple of the kids who have come through the house had that. Helping them remember their own autonomy and ability to make choices seemed to be effective. At the very least, it helped them reframe their life and realize it wasn’t all outside their control.

[anon70282812]

Thanks @Ninjastar your very knowledgeable and i appreciate your sincerity. I do what i can flaws and all. I would love to do better though so ill keep working at it

[2Waynez]

A lot of therapy and self work can help. Have a good day.

[2Waynez]

[anon70282812]

Yes ive read that however i feel my pd has been a huge affect on my life and having schizophrenia as well. I just dont do well in therapy as im not good at conversation and im very reserved, quiet.
I depend on my husband mostly and my relationship with him is a lot better now since diagnosis. Before diagnosis he just kept thinking i was playing up and things were strained.
I do my best and thanks for your advice @2Waynez