Fantasy or real?

As much as I don’t want to believe it, I believe my Doctor knows there is nothing wrong with me and in on the part where we pretend my illness label is real. I think its a label given to me for a time being until i adjust to my ‘condition’, which is really just spiritual awakening.

In short, kick ass. You are the boss.

How did this spiritual awakening change you?

I don’t know I feel more aware of my surroundings, always observing and questioning myself, my actions, my reality and the world at large. I’m impulsive therefore have no control over my thoughts and speech. I’m scared of going outside most times because I don’t know what I’ll do. I think I just need to embrace it and stop judging myself for it. These are some of the things I have noticed and after all, spiritual awakening is a process. What do you think?

What would you do?

my biggest fear is taking my clothes off again.

I can definitely relate to this feeling. Have you ever said anything to your Pdoc about this at all?

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No I haven’t. Should we?

If your in the USA, taking your clothes off in public is a definite No-No, but, if your in Europe, you might get some looks, but no one will be too distressed over it.

Talk to your pdoc about this if it hampers your life more than necessary.

That’s entirely up to you. I was just going to ask you what they said about it, if you did.

I am not sure if it is fantasy or real. No way I could know. I don’t think I am mentally ill either but many of us don’t think we are. I think my pdoc and tdoc are ‘in on it’ and part of my staged reality and I think when I do utterly crazy sh*it in public it’s because my brain is being controlled. I am not sure if I am MI or having the wool pulled over my eyes. Just in case, I take the meds. Maybe I am crazy. Maybe I’m not. I dunno.

P.S. I also feel extremely spiritually enlightened. I am ready to teach and save the world. That doesn’t seem to be uncommon with the MI

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Docs don’t work like that. You may be mind reading which is impossible or you may just be reading him wrong.

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