I used to have a close relationship with my mother, until my brother died. She stays in a state of depression and wants nothing to do with me anymore. My father has passed, my brother has passed. All I have left is my wife, my children, and my grandchild, and we all live in different worlds. All my youngest son does is play video games.(I keep telling him it is a waste of time). My wife watches netflix all day, and I code. So very lonely life.
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so you are female?
i thought u were male
marry me
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I never felt like I belonged in my family, even though we were, and still are considered āclose.ā
I just felt left out and forgotten, which I was, but at the same time, I watched as my brothers got the love and attention from my parents, so I knew it was possible, just not for me.
I wasnāt a needy child or adult, so I waitedā¦and waitedā¦for my turn to be noticed in the family.
I just lived my life the best I was able, making sure I did the right things rather than what I wanted, took care of other when needed, and tried to be an asset to the family name, rather than a liability, and waited.
and waited.
ā¦and waited.
Never say never, because at age 51, my family has noticed me for the first time, mom turning 80 this year, I finally feel like a part of this family for once, and itāsā¦ok.
What changed?
Not me, Iām the same as always (yeah, always been a bitā¦odd) but basically the same.
They must be the oneās who have changed, maybe they opened their eyeās, IDK.
I never lived my life needing their approval or attention, which is good, because I never got it,
and now that I finally got itā¦well, it hasnāt changed me in anyway.
Glad I never put my life on hold thinking āif onlyā they loved & accepted me, my life would have been better.
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Technically, but I present more like a sentient pile of laundry with a crabby face and hands sticking out.
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I can relate that s how I feel but Iām only 26 and still waitingā¦ But i hold hopeā¦ My family will see me one dayā¦ And I canāt hold it against them there involved with their livesā¦ And Iām differentā¦ I just wish I didnāt have to give it my all for a pat on the back and a " your doing fine"ā¦ Just for some attention some feeling of belongingā¦
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I think I am going to make an effort to reconnect with my loved ones.
I still like you.
Thatās how all of my extended family is. They seem to make no progression over the decades. I donāt fit in with them at all.
I struggled against my own family for a lot of years, till the edge wore down on the knife. I sort of became like my parents, too much - livivg with them - complacent.
Now all thatās left is me + my brothers. I fit in with them pretty well - we are the odd ball of the family - pitched into the game.
i used to be like this with my family until I found that being at gathering was wellā¦ boring. So instead I would approach the family members individually and ask them about themselves and what theyāre doing with my life. And then Iād talk about what Iām doing with my life. First you have to have something to say, feed yourself with information, it can be introspections your current circumstance/happenings or whatevers happening in the news/around the world, just read the headlines. Sometimes things just appear in the moment in your mind that comes up. Whatevers good, no pressure to talk. The only part that might be tricky is how to leave!! how to back out of the conversationā¦ just say ābeen nice chatting to you, gonna grab a drinkā or āiām gonna go do ____, nice talking with youā. Simple 
I acttually tried something like this weekendā¦ Pulled my uncle from the baseball game to buy him a beer and asked if he heard voicesā¦ He said he didā¦ Heās an alcoholic druggie pill popper abuserā¦ He was kicked outta the air force ā¦ Heās been through AA NA therapy but has never been diagnosedā¦ He said its from the beer and hydro that he hears themā¦ But hey 1 other person in my family hears voicesā¦Iām not alone! And yet I still amā¦
Iāve done that a few times. Entering into a conversation between the two of you about yourselves can be a good thing. You get to really know them some and a solid place begins to form inside of you to stand on. People have different versions of the old story, I guess - get married, have kids, work - and some people have interesting lives they have led unlike another person, some not so interesting to you, IDK.
Yeah I am getting along with my sister (my only sibling) pretty good. She accepts me as I am pretty much.