With the length of suffering in years to decades
I was asked by Clozapine clinic if I felt myself as I seemed not to be
My response was what self?
The amount of meds I take along with a lot of changes
Not sure my self even exists
Been a long time and I do not really seem to be able to understand how I am a real regular person
Some meds diminish the self greatly in my opinion. I don’t feel like myself either, on zyprexa.
I didn’t feel like myself on all my meds so I went rogue off them but apparently I’m intolerable without them so I guess I’m stuck. I miss myself.
I feel like myself on haloperidol now or what I understand to be myself after taking antipsychotics most my life.
I’m myself on meds. It’s not the same. Not by a long shot but those racing thoughts, fear and the simple thing of overanalyzing everything is gone. Yeah I’m not as bright but I sometimes think. Oh. This is what normal people think like. I’m not sure if I’m right because I’ve never been normal but meds have been good for me…
It’s a pity I can’t do a relationship, career or job.
My “self” is shattered in to pieces. My brain feels cracked, like a broken glass. I have these weird sensations in my brain. I used to be a resilient ■■■■■■■. Now I’m just weak.
Meds make me sleep a lot. Which is somewhat good, it’s the only escape I have. But I’m also sleeping my life away. 
I don’t think I can but mainly because I have DID
I agree with you Mr Hope.
When I first became ill and was on 15mg abilify,
It seemed to numb my brain.
I was not really living much.
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