I do. I had a fairly big group of so called friends, but I feel betrayed by them. I haven’t seen them in 16 years. They never once called on me when I was ill or depressed. Never. Also, theyre all married yet none of them invited me to their weddings. Fu*k teme.
I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry you haven’t even been invited to the weddings either. Hopefully in this stage of life… you can find new friends and pull a new group around you.
I get a little more sorrowful about the fading away of friends. I don’t really feel betrayed because I sort of left them first… with my drug days. Turned my back on a lot of friends when I started using.
Then I lost all those drug friends and drinking buddies when I sobered up and quit using.
I also lost a lot of friends due to a residual of this illness… it wasn’t the Sz that was loosing me friends… it was the anger and verbally/ physically abusing people. That was loosing me the friends.
When I got that under control… some people have come back into my life… including my middle brother.
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I used to have a big group of friends in primary school and the first few years of high school, I was fairly popular, but then things all went down hill.
In 2nd year of high school, my voice broke. I hated it. It just happened suddenly over the space of a night or two, and it was so deep, and me being so small, it sounded awful.
Due to this, I started withdrawing from speaking to people as I was embarrassed about my voice and how it sounded. This seemed unusual to people because usually I was one of the loud ones in the class, always up to no good, being the funny one, chatting away as normal to my friends. But because I didn’t like my voice, I all of a sudden one day just stopped talking to people!
It was fine at first, but after a while people started to wonder why I was being so quiet, I COULD talk, but chose not to because I was scared incase what people would think. People would ask ‘‘why do you not speak anymore’’ ‘‘are you a good boy now?’’ I felt like the world had crumbled on my shoulders.
After about 5/6 months of not talking to any of my friends, my friends started withdrawing from ME. It was gradual. Eventually I realised that all my friends had left me, basically because I had ‘changed’. The once loud, sociable, and cheeky boy I was once was no more. I was withdrawn, quiet and felt really small in among everyone else.
My dad even took me to see an throat specialist about my voice, I knew everything was fine, but I could only speak with my broken voice, which I never wanted, I wanted my old voice back!
Then from 3rd year I only really had one or two friends I could rely on, unlike my big group of friends from the past.
Then thing started to go downhill, I was getting bullied. Only from one guy, but he was massive and it was so intimidating what he was doing, I realised all this was down to my voice breaking!
I dont speak to any of my old pals now, they still say ‘‘Hi how are you doing’’ if i meet them on the street or a night out, but nothing more than that. Between 3rd and 6th year of school I felt like I was hated by them all, and thats only dulled down recently, because I’ve left school of course. I mean in 6th year I had no-one, I would lock my self in the toilet at breaks and lunch because I was too scared to go out in the social area.
I’ve only started to regain my confidence recently, and I have a fair good number of good friends, nothing as much as the past but popularity isn’t important to me now.
So your not alone! stick in there and things will work out in the long run. Don’t dwell on the past, go out and make new friends and they will accept you for who you are!
Hope this helps
Cheers,
Larry x
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I feel betrayed by about 7,269,382,500 people.
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Is that the worlds populatio
Don’t let them get to you. The friends that stick around through thick and thin are few and far between. Quality friendships are rare! Everyone deserves the time of day.
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It was a couple of hours ago.
i had no friends growing up, but i did have a selection of fluffy toys;
big ted
little ted
basil brush
i carried them everywhere, i would watch t.v with them.
take care
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The friends I had before I was became symptomatic are all gone now. I’m not much of a socialite now but I have contact with a few people through games and online that have helped. When I feel like I need to withdraw online it’s easy to just say you have something you have to go do. Trying to work more on interpersonal skills in the real world but I do think online friends have helped me a lot.
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dont get too angry about that,i do not even had a group of friends,but i plan to find one or two good friends
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One of the most influential people in that area was a friend I grew up with. My mum became friends with his mum and became friends of the family. When my friendship became rocky my parents continued on with the friendship. So was a constant rather than something I could just move on from. In 1986 he was hit by a train and died so sort of feel I’d been robbed in the chance of coming to terms with it. Although since then have had dreams of him and I guess dealing with my issues with him through the dreams. My relationship with his sister was similar but a little bit more complicated especially when you add sex to the mix. Sorry Darksith no idea how I ended up replying to you. Doesn’t come up on edit to change it.
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i read it anyway, sorry you lost your friend…it is tough losing those you care about…
know that someone cares.
take care
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