Do you compare yourself to your friends?

[mermaid1]

I mean maybe they are so much happier than me?

I did so much compared to them. On my own. I traveled across the ocean, became Canadian, lived alone in different cities, worked for multinational companies, I think it is quite an achievement for someone coming from a tiny town with average family and mediocre education.

When I went to visit my friends back in my hometown, I could not get along well.
One of my best friends married her school sweetheart who became a drug dealer. I love this girl. He is now in prison, they seem to have a lot of money, and she has two kids.

My other friend married a guy who has a nice family, a family business. They have a son. When I saw her, she said she wants to move to USA, where her parents live and she no longer cares for her marriage.
She did not study anything, or get any real job other than the marriage.

My other friend got married, she had her baby her in Canada so the baby is Canadian now. She is married to a very handsome successful guy, who works for the bank. They have a little girl now. She was one of the most rebellious ones in school but now she seems to be very religious. They live in Kuwait.

I ran into another friend in the airport, she was 8 months pregnant, traveling alone to USA so she can deliver her baby there. When I saw her at the airport gate, she was crying relentlessly and she was amazed that I travel on my own. She married a guy I know so owns his own pharmacy. They seem to live in a very big house.

A lot of my classmates are in USA now, one has a baby, I don’t think she is married. Another is married and seems very happy.

The guys in my class did not turn out well. I heard one was very sick and at a psych ward. I could not find him anywhere online to find out if he is schizophrenic. Apparently it is a very bad case.

Some became gay. some got married and have kids. a few became successful business owners.

I wonder what they think about me? No kids, marriage, living alone, popular on Facebook Lol.
I am grateful for all my decisions and the difficult times.

I always seemed to know what I wanted, it is strange how I have changed and became so unsure.

[Wave]

You have accomplished a lot in your life @mermaid1!
Be proud!

[GoldenRex]

You really have accomplished a lot,

And its good that you know that.

However, its unhealthy to compare lives with others,

You just don’t know what’s underneath the surface.

Like me, all my old friends want to visit all the time,

I have a great place, nice husband, money, no kids to take care of, I work a cool job, travel, do all sorts of fun stuff, but I’m barely clinging to sanity.

My best friend is a freaking doctor, but her personal life is in ruins and she’s borderline alcoholic.

You just never know…

[cbbrown]

A few of my friends are married and seems to be constantly pregnant. A few know I’m sick but most by now have figured out that I am gay.

[anon62973308]

I learned in day treatment that it is a healthy coping strategy to compare yourself to your peers or doing worse. Compared to most sz, you are doing great.