How important is physical appearance and personality to you? I don’t need to date a model. But I feel like I have to be somewhat physically attracted to the lady. Am I shallow for this? Personality is also important too.
I think physical attraction is something you don´t fully understand, for example, it can be how she moves or the way she looks at you. Little unexpected details.
I think virtue is what makes a woman beautiful. If she’s graceful, if she’s kind, if she’s quiet, happy, loving etc this is infinitely more important than whether she puts on half a pound of makeup or uses an olay serum. Being an evil person and scowling all day makes deep lines in a woman’s face for example so I’m just saying I think the two are linked.
That does not mean women who have lines etc are evil, just the other way around. Just pointing out that the two are linked. And this is beyond just “personality” I think. It’s like character. Not just quirks that I like but ‘are they a sweet person?’. Are they loyal… these things attract the opposite sex more than smooth skin.
This is because evolutionarily the character factors are far more important to survival than the skin deep factors like well proportioned features etc. Evolutionarily speaking is it more advantageous to the gene pool for a woman to have a well proportioned face or be loyal and dedicated mothers? The latter. Therefore the males of that species will be more attracted to the later. The former is however a factor though far less important.
TL;dr … Virtuous women are beautiful
You gotta be physically attracted to someone to have a relationship in most relationships at least since being sexual is a big thing with most relationships in my opinion as long as you’re not asexual sex in a relationship is important and healthy
Well I’m 63 years old. Ideally you should love the person you are with, and not really think about what they look like. I can tell you with my experience physical beauty fades with time.
I want the whole package.
I mean beauty, personality, intelligence, class, etc
I think the distinction that needs to be made is between a “pretty” woman and a “beautiful” woman.
Prettiness is skin deep
Beauty is everything beyond that. But I maintain that being beautiful can even make a woman pretty.
I try not to care much about prettiness, the same way I would not buy a car based on the paint. Once you look under the hood it’s evident which is the logical choice.
All other things being equal ofcourse. Like if these were two random women you just met. That’s just attraction though (non sexual). There are other factors like what is the right woman to choose. This goes into morality and not just attraction. But a virtuous person will always draw others toward them.
On a scale of 1 to 10, a woman goes up two points if she likes me.
There is inner and outer beauty.
Both are important to me.
But she doesn’t have to be perfect, no one is perfect. I’ll compromise on both a little. I take the whole package into consideration.
Are you still seeing that guy in the military @anon54988740?
Did you get to meet him in person yet?
No yet @Wave. We are still chatting with each other though. I’m not counting on him showing up though, even though he says he is.
Well good luck with everything
Hopefully a long-term relationship is based on something beyond appearances. Time makes us all ugly and you’ll need other reasons to keep holding hands and giggling together after the looks have faded.
Well said dood!
yeslooksandpersonality
I want to feel comfortable with them and feel a soul connection.
If we got that they will be beautiful to me no matter what their body looks like.
I value down to earth person with life experience who is humble and kind and who I’m comfortable with and who accepts me as I am.
What good is it to date someone “physically perfect so yo say” if you are uncomfortable with them and they are stuck up and try bossing you about n don’t accept you…
I don’t think you’re shallow. I think finding someone somewhat as attractive as yourself matters to some extent.
Sexual chemsitry is important but you learn to love little things and certain physical things. At least for me but I’m pretty average looking so I don’t expect attractive people to think I’m the same. Still. I’m with @Jayster . It’s about two people liking each other and getting down with it!