I used to injure myself as a teenager, I also used to cut myself - my arms, legs, and there was a point where my mixed states were so bad, I even put a razor blade to my face and began to cut away as a young adult.
Cutting one’s self is a symptom of many different types of disorders - illnesses. Trauma, abuse victims, people with depression, bipolar - mood disorders and yes especially those afflicted with borderline personality disorder tend to self injure or cut themselves. People cut for various reasons. Cutting ones self releases endorphins so they feel better from all of the emotional pain they are going through, it is a way to feel something and cope with an overload of emotions and internal pain. I used to cut myself as a way to cope with the inner turmoil and pain I was going through - severe mixed states can trigger some to self injure - I also show signs of borderline personality disorder - My therapist at first tried to address my borderline symptoms then she kind of steered away from it, choosing not to treat this in me - my schizophrenic and bipolar symptoms are her main focus.
The bottom line is if you cut, or self injure yourself, it is time to go see a doctor and yes even a therapist. Cutting as I know too well, is playing with fire - As soon as I was on the right meds, the cutting stopped, because the inner emotional pain stopped. I do not cut myself any longer, I havent cut myself in many years - but I still have the scars as a reminder- I do not have visible scars on my face, thank goodness.
Here are some Myths and Facts on Cutting
Myths and facts about cutting and self-harm
Because cutting and other means of self-harm tend to be taboo subjects, the people around you—and possibly even you—may harbor serious misconceptions about your motivations and state of mind. Don’t let these myths get in the way of getting help or helping someone you care about.
Myth: People who cut and self-injure are trying to get attention.
Fact: The painful truth is that people who self-harm generally do so in secret. They aren’t trying to manipulate others or draw attention to themselves. In fact, shame and fear can make it very difficult to come forward and ask for help.
Myth: People who self-injure are crazy and/or dangerous.
Fact: It is true that many people who self-harm suffer from anxiety, depression, or a previous trauma—just like millions of others in the general population. Self-injury is how they cope. Slapping them with a “crazy” or “dangerous” label isn’t accurate or helpful.
Myth: People who self-injure want to die.
Fact: Self-injurers usually do not want to die. When they self-harm, they are not trying to kill themselves—they are trying to cope with their pain. In fact, self-injury may be a way of helping themselves go on living. However, in the long-term, people who self-injure have a much higher risk of suicide, which is why it’s so important to seek help.
Myth: If the wounds aren’t bad, it’s not that serious.
Fact: The severity of a person’s wounds has very little to do with how much he or she may be suffering. Don’t assume that because the wounds or injuries are minor, there’s nothing to worry about.
I was told by the guy who formally evaluated me that my exercise at the time was equivalent to cutting. He said if I was female, I would most likely be cutting daily. He said that shrinks call people who cut themselves “sergeants” and that I was just like them.
I would do stupid things like drink 4 cups of coffee, eat one piece of toast and then run for an hour. I would practice muay thai and krav maga on my bags and had bruises all over my shins and elbows, and raw knuckles which were always nasty looking. I have scars on my right hand from punching inanimate objects and have also messed up the bones in that hand multiple times. I punched a glass covered picture, a brick wall, a concrete floor, a hole in drywall, i forget
Glad to hear it’s been years since you self-harmed, keep it going! I have two scars on my face, but they are quite faint, good good. Thanks for the trigger warning. It’s been two weeks and two days.
I really like those myths you posted. I used to cut for years and had a couple of close calls. I haven’t cut for a few years because I no longer have that emotional pain. The one time I was really disassociated because I was taking a test and went blank. I had studied all day and when the test came I went blank. It was in my engineering class and I had never blanked out on a test before. I freaked because this was my future and was afraid what that meant. To bring myself out of it I thought I could cut a little and be fine but I went really deep because I couldn’t feel it. It was like I watched my skin unzipper. My roommate took me to the ER and they weren’t sure if they would have to send me out because it was so bad. I got internal and external stitches. I actually got a B on the test and did well in the class.
Cutting is so misunderstood. I’m so ashamed of my scars. I’ve been using Mederma PM and they seem like they are getting better. Good luck to you.
I think cutting is a way of taking care of ourselves. When your wounded without physical evidence, it"s hard to let the wounded self heal.
When you can see the wound, you know it’s real and then can allow yourself to take care of the hurt.
Scars are badges of inner strength that has remained underground, as in not validated.
My sis has carved into herself, it started this year, and happens during exam panic.
But to “hide” it or justify it, she’s carved yin/yang signs, waves, Om. She was saying it’s just tribal scaring and no big deal and she doesn’t do it all the time. It’s artistic.
I’m saying it’s still sharp knife into skin that seems to happen during high stress times.
there was a girl in the ward i was at a long time ago and she was crying and cutting herself so i went away and got her some tissues and i think she really appreciated that
@sasha maybe you can reach out to get some help? Meds could help your situation so can talking things through with a therapist. Once my mood stabilized all the turmoil stopped and so did the cutting - meds was necessary for me
@wave I have an appointment for the 23rd. I am on celexa and that seems to be helping some with the depression and anxiety… but it is not doing anything for the Sz symptoms. And I HATE HATE HATE HATE anti-psychotics, I am not sure I will ever want to get back on those.
My son burned himself with cigarrettes. He told me that he could not feel anything-I took that to mean that he could not feel ANYTHING at all—no emotions-and that he was trying to feel something, anything.
Please be certain that the talk therapist is making you feel better in some way rather than leaving you feel they are not helping. I was reccommended talk therapy every two weeks to help with cutting. He made me question myself and kept insisting my family was to blame and this never sat right with me. With in 4 months, I was actively suicidal, and then after the 3 serious attempt, they recommended me to see a psychiatrist=meds.
Sounds silly that I kept going back, but they were adamant about me continuing because it had to get worse before it got better. Nothing got better no matter how long I went, I finally stopped, but the damage was done. What a waste of time and money, and it almost cost me my life.
Yes I definitely agree - meds are more important, and if you find a good therapist , great. There are many therapists that I would steer far away from. Finding the right fit is important
Meds are important, but you have to take them for them to work. I so did not trust my pdoc after all I went through and I refused meds, that only made them angrier and spiteful, to which I responded by non compliance. It became a lose-lose situation.
Talk only can be very beneficial, if you are comfortable enough and feel things are getting better.
