Cotard delusion

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anyone ever had cotard delusion? the delusion that you believe you are dead

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I had it when I was first hospitalized. I woke up in hospital and thought that I was dead.

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I had the delusion that someone else was dead.

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I had the delusion that I am non existent and the world too.

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I had it the second time I was hospitalised. I had taken a med overdose and everything felt different in the hospital so I wasn’t sure if i was dead in another dimension or if I was alive.

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I’ve planeshifted to a lower realm before, but I was still alive. At least conscious.

It’s part of the illness.

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I had a delusion that I had died when I was taken to a hospital to get checked out because my mother was worried about how I was acting. I was left alone for a while in the hospital room and for some reason I got it into my mind that I was dead so I walked out of the hospital ha.

I went on to steal a few beads from a Christian store that meant something to me significantly at the time. I then proceeded to consider stealing a van but then decided on walking towards home instead.

I passed by a brew pub that had live music playing outside. I thought at that point I was with others who had died and that I was in heaven or purgatory, this was due to hearing them playing “Hotel California” and me thinking the native American playing guitar had been someone from Vietnam war. My way of thinking was very irrational until I had a few beers at which point I decided to walk home.

I don’t know how long I really had thought I was dead for but it was a few hours at least. It got broken up by semi rational thought and only occured that day. It was as if I was in a different sandbox type reality that was very similar to the reality I had “lived” in. I proceeded to have many other delusions after that though and ended up getting picked up by police due to walking on the railroad and taken to the hospital.

I can keep going if asked but I will take a break from typing for now…

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the what happened ? wasnt that dissociation ?

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you believed that? how did you act on it?

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I just walked around in a psychotic state really.

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how did it went away

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It just went away. I was put on meds.

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I checked with all the doctors if the amount of meds I had could have killed me
Apparently it wasn’t enough to kill me
After time things started to feel more normal again so I believed it was OK.

Took me about a week to come through

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Yep. Walked into a crisis session and declared I was dead. That was my first admission then at the same time I was worried that I wasn’t gonna see my 24th birthday. Weird. You’re dead and you’re worried about a birthday.

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