Gal : “Oh, Patrick. You’re always so polite and quiet!”
Me: " Yeah. But it’s always the polite and quiet ones who have severed heads in their freezers at home isn’t it?"
Gal: “AAAaaaahhhh!!”
(I hope she knows i was joking) 
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Excuse me for posting in your thread, sir. I hope my presence here does not offend. I just wanted to inform you that I have no bodies in my freezer. And there are definitely no bodies buried in my back yard. Have a wonderful day! 
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"Chatted At Work Today With Female Colleague"
methinketh i hope to live without much communication. i misinterpret communication sometimes.
I took a test. It says I’m a sadist.
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I have head and shoulders in my shower
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lol! Good one, @Moonwalker! 
I posted on this old forum, that a girl at my work kept rubbing her hand up and down my arm whenever we spoke. I asked the members what it meant. One guy posts in and says, “She’s trying to steal your watch” lol!