My mind has been playing tricks on me since two days ago. I experienced some changes on my various internet accounts of which I can’t remember that I have done them. I became so paranoid. Last night at midnight I was changing usernames and passwords on some of my accounts. This morning at 03:30 I stood up again and changed what other passwords I can think of. It felt like someone has invaded my e-mail accounts. laptop password, this sz.com password, facebook etc. I got a lot of sleep today and I’m feeling much better now. I don’t think that this is the beginning of a relapse but my thinking and behavior as such gave me a scare. Is this a short flight of paranoia or psychosis and do any of you think it is so troublesome that I should make an early intervention and go and see my pdoc?
Hi @anon18305065 - I usually dont go calling up my pdoc asking for help after only one episode - it usually takes more than one episode and then I will call - It is ultimately your decision and you know your mind best- best of luck to you
Thank you @Wave. I believe it is good advice not to call my pdoc for just this one episode. It is just that I have been doing so well for the past year and when this happened to me now I got a bit of a fright. I’m feeling okay at the moment though.
I am glad that you are feeling ok at the moment @Fellowman - having breakthrough episodes from time to time, is natural, especially if stress is involved. When the episodes are frequent or serious, this might be a good time to call the pdoc - I do hope that you feel better
I used to have similar episodes in the past, but not any longer. Then I went so far that I encrypted all my usernames and passwords with PGP so that nobody was able to access this password file. This was long time ago. I understand how you feel.
I have also saved all my usernames and passwords in a password protected file. If someone should get a hold of that then I’d be really vulnerable. I’m going to stay positive that this is only a once off episode. My pdoc once asked me during such a single episode if I was able to sort of talk me out of it? That made me realize that for some episodes we can really talk ourselves out of it. Sometimes we have to talk to other people just to get a reality check.
My passwords seem to change every other month and right after I change them. I haven’t been able to access my facebook page but maybe 3 times in the last 2years. I’m pretty sure it’s sabotage, naturally, but I lose intrest in the computer stuff and don’t care much anymore.
I 'm just not that interesting to mess with, so I have to wonder what people get out of it.
Today I keep all my passwords and usernames in my mind, I do not have very many, but it works.
In some other world they recommend people to change their passwords regularly. That was long time ago.
I can relate to that @Csummers. I’m also not very interesting so it is a valid point to think what people would really get out of it. It has been a long time for me as well since I’ve lost all interest in computer stuff. It is only lately that I have started to show some interest again. I even stopped watching television but have got a little bit of interest back. This illness leaves us with so much emotional agony that we loose interest in everything that used to make life worth living. But I’m not going to lie down. I’ll fight this battle everyday with good hope and as much positivity I can manage.
It is also a good thing to keep all of the passwords in your mind but some accounts I do not access so often and then I tend to forget the passwords that is why I keep them in a password protected file. Sometimes I keep the accounts like Facebook open but I’m not gonna do that anymore. It is safer to close it and too log in again. The only password that I don’t have saved somewhere is the one for my bank account.
I do not watch TV much either, news are full of negative news and I do not want that in my mind, but what comes to your password protected password file the fact may well be that they can break this protection quite quickly with modern decryption methods and high performing computers. Sometimes it is more secure just write your passwords on paper and keep it in the safe location. The internet is full of these malwares and viruses.
I think the fact that you remember what you did… and remember the new passwords…
You were able to get some sleep and feel better… I’d say keep an eye on your stress and how your feeling and if you keep feeling better, you might not need to see your doc.
I hope you feel better.
Thanks @SurprisedJ. I’ll watch my stress levels and monitor my symptoms. Although I was feeling okay afterwards I was still very anxious but think that was as a result of my fear of an episode. It is 3am where I’m sitting now in South Africa and I’m fortunately not changing passwords at this time but merely doing some reading since I’ve woke up and can’t sleep. I’m going to lie down just now again.