Carer burnout

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I’m a carer for an elderly relative and tomorrow we’re going for the results of a liver scan.

This elderly relative has told me they’ll refuse treatment if it’s cancer. Which it probably will be, as they’ve had an operation to remove a tumour already.

I’ve finally reached carer burnout. I don’t mind being a carer for someone who wants to live. But I don’t care anymore.

Just venting.

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How old are they?
Maybe they have been expecting the inevitable for a while and just want to go comfortably without any fuss. In their own way

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They’re 84, but healthier than me.

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Thats a good age. I would carry on being there for them
Try not to burnout
Rest

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I feel for you. Sending (((hugs))).

:heart:

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I can understand this as a physical caregiver.

There are things you can do and things that you feel helpless as a caregiver.

It’s sometimes is physically exhausting and mentally too.

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I was a partial caregiver for my Mom who was wheelchair bound and suffered from dementia.

Being a caregiver to a sick older person is very hard draining work.

Try to have some time for yourself

Getting burned out is easy if you are not careful @everhopeful

Also did you volunteer to be your family member’s caregiver?

Or were you placed into that position by others?

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It just happened. My brother has a wife, 4 kids and a job. He wouldn’t have been able. So I was “it” by default.

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Yeah same with me.
My brother works full time plus I live with my Mom when she was alive.

But she also sacrificed so much for me in my life.

I was happy to do it

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M sorry you are dealing with this. I have been there also. You are not alone. It helped me to avoid thinking about it whenever I could. Once my family members were already dead, I could unpack how much it all sucked. Until then, it didn’t help to acknowledge how hard it was. It just made it seem harder.

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Well, after all that my elderly relative got the all clear today. So I feel like a fool for worrying so much.

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I’m glad your relative is ok. Can someone give you a little break for some self care, even if it’s to just get out and do something fun? That might help a lot. Like one day a week for you might be very beneficial, even if you no longer have to worry about your relative losing their will to fight to live.

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Thats good news!
Take care

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That’s a good idea. I’ll see if I can meet up with my brother to do something.

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I’m glad your relative is doing well.
Yeah make sure you give yourself frequent breaks @everhopeful

But I know it’s not easy

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Thanks wave. Yes, I will.

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