Can you think about your parents' mistakes without malice?

Well, I don’t agree with the argument ‘our parents gave us life so we owe them everything.’

That’s not to say we don’t owe them a lot, everyone’s situation is different.

Personally, my own situation, I like how Salvador Dali ‘paid back’ his absent father.

I won’t post it here, but you can web search it if you want to know.

Sure, my parents never really screwed up my life. I mean we were poor, so we did Christmas & Birthdays late but I’ve never been into material possessions. They are just human, I have never felt unloved.

“Never felt unloved” doesn’t sound mentally ill.

Lol not by my parents at least.

My dad was very distant from me…although he’s improved so I’ve forgiven him.

My mom was ashamed of me at one point, stressed out by me. But when I started struggling really bad she showed more love.

You gotta appreciate the fact that ,many parents didn’t have Google and they did the best that they were naturally and socially able to do.

I dont hold it against my ma or pop for my current status.

My ma taught me about yeast and living organisms.

My pop taught me the proper etequet of shooting a 44 cal. And how to kill said organisms

My parents did a good job I think.

my parents tried. they didn’t know about the sexual abuse by a family friend until I was ten, after four years of abuse. and my brother was an out of control kid. for example he sawed the family couch in half. my mom worked two jobs both physically demanding including a maid job. my dad when he could work, worked as a buser or dishwasher. sometimes they both would be out of work for months once during Christmas time and the only gift I got that year was a cd from an uncle. but somehow they kept the lights one, a roof over our heads and our bellies full. I have no malice towards my parents, they made mistakes but they did try.

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I am trying to forgive my Dad. He took me last year after the hospital let me out and I was homeless. I would be lying if I said I don’t love him because I do. None of that changes the past though. He was an alcaholic and emotionally abusive and neglectful toward me. I have 2 kids of my own (20 and 17) whom I showered with love and praise and who are very high functioning and balanced. I can’t even fathom treating my beautiful babies the way he treated me. He cut me so many times to the core. It seems worse now than it did when I was younger in sharp contrast to how I raised my kids. I have a bit of a hard heart. He will never take accountability or apologize. That’s not his ‘style’. I have to just get over it and try to appreciate that he quit drinking (2 years ago), treats me better now and that he took me in. He was a shytty Dad when I was younger. Oh well.