Hey! Thats how I look…((22 y.o))
Problem is, I become more and more obsessed with my appeareance- I do overthink do I need plastic surgery everyday. I overthink every flaw I have (dont want to go into details)
I was into psychoteraphy and I do wanted to solve my problem, but only thing I’ve heard was “why do you want to change yourself?” “You do not have facial fratures or body smth which is really ugly”. I thought like “wow, how should feel someone, who is perceived from society as really ugly then?”
That psychoterapist was crap. It didnt solved any of my problems, I still overthink whether I should undergo plastic surgery- because on social media I see these perfect girls,(yes, perfect bodies, faces) and how much attention they get, i just feel like I am kind of… missing out? You know, simply not being as beautiful as I could be.
I know I shall accept myself BUT I SWEAR its one of the toughest things in life to do. I feel like sometimes I crave for someone to tell me “youre beautiful the way you are”, but whenever I hear something similar - it does not change anything.
Is this body dysmorphia? What shall I do to actually accept myself?
You look very pretty to me. I think if you feel this bad about yourself when you look as nice as you do, you are likely to feel the same way, even if you have plastic surgery. I think you will see flaws no matter how great you look.
thank you so much Then I believe I actually do have a problem… I believe it started from my childhood - when I was seeing these reaally beautiful girls and believing one day I could reach that level.
Also, my psychosis distorted my view of me… I sometimes felt like I am better than I am, and when I came back from psychosis it felt like “ew, I am normal I guess” Kind of funny story, during pscyhosis sometimes I felt like a God
Your an attractive young lady. I know it can be hard to except yourself the way you are, but thats the way you were created, and if the creator is perfect than he made you perfect in his eye’s. Who cares what other’s think. I used to have body dysmorphia, i was a bodybuilder for many years and i always hated the way i looked. I had to except myself the way i was and to know im exactly the way im supposed to be. Im old now but i except myself and im alot happier than when i was bodybuilding.
Thank you… And I feel sorry for you, that you also were going through this. And also, good that you’re happier now.
I guess, that’s what societal expectations does to us… it feels like we’re never enough. Probably, the biggest problem starts when we see ourselves worse than others do.
While we cant diagnose you i can say i have body dysmorphia and dysphoria and can relate to some degree. While im not interested in plastic surgery i used to be very preoccupied with certain features on my body, always hyper aware and self conscious trying to hide them. I would recommend finding a competent therapist who will actually listen and not dismiss you. Body image issues are so common unfortunately but now that im 30 im finding it much less of a concern
I’ve got body image issues too. Like @Grookey said, it’s very common.
I mean I’m not surprised all the movie stars look a certain way, generally, and porn stars too, look a certain way, generally, and the models, too, generally. So it makes us feel this is the ideal.
I personally felt, and idk if this applies to you, but I’ll just say in case it helps, that I didn’t really apply enough self care and that’s why I feel a bit self conscious.
Also there’s been horrible ppl saying degrading things about me physically. At a time when I took other ppls opinion more seriously than my own.
At the end of the day even if my self care isn’t at its best, I’m still beautiful inside and that’s what really matters. I’m trying my best and that’s what really matters. I don’t mean harm on people and that’s beautiful.
The way we look physically at first glance is bound to differ for different people, perhaps. But as ppl get to know ppl the personality is what shines through, regardless of how someone perceived someone at first glance.
I hope what I’m saying is acceptable, I don’t even know. The moderation team and the rest of you can tell me if I’m being out of line.
It’s like our emotions and feelings and motivations and dreams etc. are flowing throughout our entire physical body.
So in that respect, how can I call any physical aspect of me, ugly.
Btw you have a cute nose
I AGREE SO MUCH. (about the part with porn and movie stars)… That’s is like natural that they look that way, because it’s a standard to be thin, long-legged, simply having a beautiful face…, but also really creating more insecurities in normal-everyday people.
Also, the problem is with making “Being young” the only possible way to live. It’s tragic, that most girls in porn are actual teenagers, like 18-20 (I am actually feeling too old to do this, haha )
I know that what matters is inside, but I am so fearful that most people I know do not give a **** what I feel, that I read a lot, that I always try to be a best-human possible… maybe I just meet the wrong people.
Sadly, there are men who care ONLY about appearance, nothing more. Also of course there are women like that… yeah so, probably it’s hard to not get lost in this world. Mostly because many people care about how much money you have, or how you look - these few diamonds we meet in life (which care about what we think, feel and want) are actual diamonds.
Oh, thank you! I hate my nose, and somehow it made me smile
İ used to have same problem.i found invega very effective that problem
Oh, i have body images issues too, its common yeap… My grief marked me for the worst in fact, but now i try to heal… The only cure is to start to love ourselves again, my meds didnt help me on my body issues…
You are not alone, so yeap I even am afraid, that i have some other physical illness, who makes me look bad too… But anyway, love yourself.
Me, ive aged too and to be honest, i think sometimes of some eventual procedures, but i wont do them in any case until i didnt accept myself fully and until i dont gain a realistic image of myself lol!
Thats how it is for me. Now, i wouldnt have been happier even if i get some corrections, plus i risk to regret them… No way until i dontlove myself as i am now, thats how it is for me heh.
I have never come across such men but maybe you are right.
I used to think OK so there’s me, the not so attractive physically compared to another woman who is more physically attractive overall.
We are both OK personality wise so why would they choose me over her?
I think it’s about the fact that we all have unique personalities.
And one personality may suit one guy better than another.
But it also disturbs me sometimes to think there are ppl who place more importance on physical than personality. Because it makes me feel like I’m USELESS existence. (sort of lol) ppl here will say I’m beautiful and I am but no one here has seen me naked. Lol.
So yes, I also do still struggle a little with my body image but I’m slowly beginning to think that ppl do care about personality a lot. I mean would a person really want to befriend a horrible person even if they found them incredibly physically attractive. I feel maybe no, even if it takes that person time to discover so. Idk, it’s just what I feel intuitively.
Im very much appalled by woman who have undergone complex plastic surgery, like lip filler, and strange, slim noses, i wouldn’t touch them if i had the chance. I call them “plastic dolls”
I know its easy to say. Body dysmorphic disorder is a complex thing, but please don’t spoil your pretty and natural look.
Also… I like to keep in mind that different is interesting.
I think I remember @ZombieMombie once saying that.
My hair is thinned. And my face shape is… Interesting. Etc etc etc. It would be rude to call me ugly but I’m definitely not a model and I don’t care… A person either likes me or doesn’t. Finds me attractive or doesn’t.
On the other hand we are social creatures… That’s why I like to believe that majority of people like someone more based on things such as what kind of person they are. It just makes me feel better and also I do notice that pattern more from my experience.
Just remember, you can get all the surgery you want now, but it still doesnt stop the aging process (for anybody).
I get it but please dont dehumanize someone because theyve had cosmetic surgery
OK, the truth is you really are beautiful the way you are. You’re very attractive and you have nice eyes. You don’t need plastic surgery and most plastic surgery makes people look artificial and weird anyways i.e. look at Madonna.
And by the way, a lot of these women you are comparing yourself to on social media may be good looking but a lot of it is makeup and $200 hair styles. The truth is there will always be women better looking than you and there will always be women who are not as good looking as you. Struggling to look as good as models and actresses who rely on their beauty and their bodies to make a living is fruitless and a waste of time.
I think you are strikingly good looking.
I’m not sure the purpose of your post? Are you asking people to convince you that you are pretty, because you posted a picture of yourself? Obviously we’d have to be pretty heartless to say you aren’t pretty.
All I feel should be said, is that you shouldn’t compare any part of yourself to others. When you compare your looks or appearance to others, you begin to think they are judging you as inferior, when in reality you are only judging yourself as inferior.
So have confidence in who you are, and nurture yourself in the way it is intended, where you don’t think of the value that others put on you, but rather how much you should value yourself as a unique and beautiful human being however you want to be.