Big change in perspective

Ever since my divorce in October of last year, I have been “on my knees” emotionally about being alone and feeling down all the time…this last week I’ve been crying more than usual and feeling like really needing to change my life I reached out the last couple of days to strong motivators in my family and I came away feeling really strong…strong enough in fact to go ahead and stop smoking again today (March 1st). I feel amazingly confident this time around for some reason, but not “over” confident because I got five days stopped last time and went back…I was encouraged by family not to see that as a failure, in fact, as a reason to try again…so I am asking yet again for support from members here. Thank you for reading this long post…


Hey Michael,
I know you can can stop those stinky cigs for longer than 5 days last time (yay! 5 days is a great start!!
You’re stronger than you think. Life can be good again. Take out that banjo again and play those not-your-friend cigs a silly good riddance song.
Stay strong, I’m rooting for ya!


Good for you for not letting a set back stop you !


I’m glad to hear your picking yourself up and giving it another go. It might take time, but you only fail if you give up. As long as you keep trying, you’ll make it.



Good for you for trying to quit smoking. It’s one of the hardest things in the world to do.

You need to keep vigilant - for a long time. Things will get easier as the days and weeks - even months go by. But a fleeting thought or image is all it takes to want a cigarette. Stop the thought before it can continue.

All of you are so excellent for trying to help me…truth is, I just got to thinking…hmmm, I need a glass of red wine, and then I thought …can’t…you’ll want a cigarette…so what did I do? I bought wine and cigs…I give up…at least for a long while I give up…I am upset if I smoke, and upset when I don’t smoke, I can’t decide which is worse…I talked with a family member last night who said…at least you WANT to quit…not any more…something in life is going to kill me, might as well be cigarettes…sorry that’s just the way I feel right now…

Perhaps it would help to understand nicotine addiction. It as an addiction like any other and not easy to overcome. Relapses are normal. Rarely does someone decide they want to quit and walk away from the habit just like that. I think addiction has it’s own way of sneaky brain thinking as SurprisedJ calls it. A way of making you think that you really want it so that it can stay alive. To a certain extent you do want it because your body has learned to depend on it. Retraining your body to not depend on it takes time.

Try googling nicotine addiction. Here is one link:


Thank you Barbie, I have decided to start another quit date as soon as the carton is smoked away (why did I buy a whole carton?) and this time I am already sure to not drink alcohol anymore either…that was what drove me to want a cigarette, not my will power or lack of therein this time…I drank last night and I didn’t even like it…so, I’m going to go straight edge…no drinking, drugs or cigarettes…sounds tough probably but I’m not much of a drinker, and I’ve been “weed free” four months now…so I feel I can do it now. I have some tools I learned from participating in a 12 step program before, so I feel I really do finally have a good chance next time…I don’t feel “right” when I smoke cigs…I’m against them greatly enough it upsets me when I smoke…