I don’t know if anyone can relate to any of this
I masked to try and fit in with family and friends, to get on with them i would fake it, had anxiety from very young age
I would prefer to be around one kid or on my own i couldn’t deal with more than
I couldn’t remember anything in class despite how hard i tried, i used to copy maths and other school work from my best friend
I was fearful of adults
Sensory issues to noise and touch
Not much has changed except no longer in school
I still mask fake to try and be normal and to get on with family
I find eye contact difficult
I still have anxiety and im still fearful of everyone, its never gone away
I plan everything in my head before going out because im afraid of being out of my comfort zone so i rarely go out
Its definitely not just an autism thing masking, social anxiety and sensory issues.
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i had everything except faking it. i realised its all in my head now am happier
I remember when I was 19 I would mask to socialize with a big people group, I had an involuntary tic because of that and it went away once I wasn’t hanging around on big groups.
Camouflaging or putting on my best normal is something that has become more and more normal as the years go by, rehearsing conversations in my head before meeting up with a friend. Putting on a brave face, acting as normal as i can despite true self feelings
Its more common in females than males with autism i read but im not sure i have autism? I had no development delays
I have autism and adhd and I found everything you said relatable. Not everyone with autism has developmental delays.
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Thanks @anon19606225 i don’t know what is mental illness ie schizophrenia or something else. I haven’t been open enough with pdoc team etc. I hold a lot back
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I get that I didn’t tell them a lot of things at the start either the stuff that took me to get help was scary and new, it took me some time to be more open, honestly I suspected autism a lot of years before getting diagnosed.
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I struggle with eye contact a lot too. And also plan everything i do meticulously. Down to what im going to say. I cant spontaneously speak much. No more than a short sentence.
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Do you have autism @Ozzyskits because i thought i seen your username on a similar topic here when i looked before
Im quiet i cant either
This feels really strange
I was asked by a work manager years ago did i have autism
And my sister thinks i do but its weird i never believed it
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I’ve always been somewhat different/out of sync. An ‘oddball’ you might say. I’ve always struggled to make friends, my late wife being the solitary exception to that. I find it very hard to initiate F2F conversations. Have never been able to intuitively grasp the unspoken rules of social engagement in the way that even a rather unexceptional NT can. Like many late dxed with ASD(Aspergers) I was severely bullied,especially so at public school(private boarding 13-18).
@firemonkey unfortunately i can relate to part, im sorry you went through this too.
@firemonkey
I thought autism was delayed development as a child
I had a lot of anxiety and fear, i was very quiet , masked, camouflaged, socially inept all still applies
Is it worth asking doctor do you think?
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Try some of these . There is one re ‘camouflaging’ .
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Thanks ive already scored high on the tests online
I don’t trust an online test properly thats why i wanted other people’s views and to see if anyone could relate, so far you all can which makes me think it might be an idea to mention it
The online tests are ,of course, not diagnostic tools. However they should strengthen or weaken the feeling that it would be worthwhile to seek an assessment.
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I do the tests occasionally but i always talked myself out of taking it any further
Im off to bed now, chat again nice chatting to you all
I was weird as a toddler. Even as a baby i would cry 6 hrs straight every evening. As a toddler i was anxious. So anxious if my mom put me in a room with other people, i would stand frozen like a statue and not interact with anyone. A doctor pointed out my lack of eye contact around age 2. By age 11 i was on antipsychotics.
@irrelevant whats wrong? Up late i see
Mods can you close this topic ive had answers
Thanks @anon55031185 @Bowens @Ninjastar @anon4362788