Am I a Nice Guy


I am reading up on a book about dating and I came across a section where they say that Nice guys are the ones that are concerned on doing it right. Now I know I am the kind that believes that If I am nice,good,and caring I will feel good about it. Though I never expected to care about what I get in return or about being right in anyone’s eye.


Don’t despair!

You are you, be the good person you’ve always felt like being. That is you. Take tips from the books, but don’t change yourself into an imitation of another person.

“Dating” is not an institution which cannot be picked apart.

It describes a variety of rigid scripts which formalize “casual” interactions between dudes or chicks who want need some sort of framework to interact with each other in.

Some might say “dating” is a silly courtship ritual which caught on in recent times in the western world among young folks.

It doesn’t work, other folks aren’t only there for you to have hollywood romantic adventures with.

They are dynamic individuals with unique fears, aspirations and issues.

Not everyone is satisfied with playing with other people to make themselves feel like they are accepted (by society, by the other person).

Try and understand yourself as you relate to folks in a way which you feel fits your own personality.

Don’t just recycle a silly script thought up and pushed on ppl by some silly TV show, or marketed to you by a dating app or self help book.

Those guys do not want you to be happy, the only want your attention so they can make money.

They will tell you that who you are is wrong and that you will always be alone and never be accepted if you do not doubt your self and read and purchase all of their useless literature.

At least this is my opinion.

Seek to understand yourself and others outside of models presented to you (and everyone) by ppl who just want your money.

They want your money, they do not benefit if you are happy with who you are. :money_mouth_face:

You are valuable. So is everyone else. Already, as you are right now. You do not need to buy anything to be better.

Try and navigate the world in a way which makes you feel fulfilled, fight battles which really matter to you.

Value people who YOU value, not those who others tell you are valuable.

Build your own summits to climb rather than translating those of others over to your life. :mount_fuji::mountain:

And then climb them! :grin::ok_hand:

…courtship is stil a necessary thing for ppl, even outside of the romance thing…

…you’ve gotta get to know ppl before you are at ease around them, there is alot of subtlety to these things…


I will do everything I can to undermine these dating apps and similar things.

They only want to make people sad. And I’m sad enough as it is.

I see that as a personal attack. :joy:


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