I have started feeling emotions

I have started feeling sad, sometimes I have tears in my eyes, I have started feeling something I have not experienced before, I do not know if this is a good thing … sometimes I just want to cry by myself …

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Hope u feel better soon…
U are a good person…

In this morning I woke up and felt really sad and somehow I thought that it is senseless to continue like this, sometimes I just want to disappear from here to somewhere …

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I would argue that it could be a good thing, though I realize it may not seem that way at the moment. If you’re able to feel emotions again, that means maybe you can feel happiness again :slight_smile:. I know how it is to feel nothing, to feel dead inside. Perhaps this is progress for you! It can be awful feeling sad, though; I’m just hoping this means happiness could be right around the corner for you.

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In the past I have been able to control my emotions but this is now a different feeling/situation, sometimes my emotions seem to be very dark and sometimes everything seems to be the sunshine, I do not like those dark emotions at all, but this sadness is real, I see other people living with their families, they have everything that I never achieved, I am just really sad now.

How I feel now …

http://www.hybridlava.com/wp-content/uploads/Expressive-Photography-Examples13.jpg

Damn, I’m sorry to hear you’re going through so much darkness. Yeah, I read your other thread after I had posted that comment. I just have this habit of trying to put a positive spin on things, searching for the silver lining. It’s easier to do that for other people, though, than it is to do it for myself when I’m the one walking through darkness.

It is ok to be positive, I have also tried to be positive in the past, it has helped me, but now my situation is quite different, I can not help that I feel these dark emotions, sometimes very dark, but I try to control my darkness, but when I saw the reality yesterday, I really became so sad.

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After facing the reality yesterday I just wanted to take my meds, and just sleep and to wake up in the new world, but guess what … I woke up to the same world as it was yesterday.

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Somehow I just see my society changing and some people disappearing as they have done in this winter, I do not know their real names but at least, ‘ohukais-nainen’, ‘Paksu-Pete’ and ‘rollaattori-mies’ have disappeared from my local society, I used to see them every day, maybe they have gone to some treatment facility, died or moved away. I have been here already 15 years and I have not managed to have any friends. All these things make me so sad.

Maybe you’re depressed mjseu. I used to have those moments. However since started on my meds about 2 years ago I noticed that my emotions aren’t all over the place anymore. They stay about the same.

No, I am just very sad, after facing the reality I became so sad, in 2016 four people whom I knew died, this also made me so sad.

Well cheer up if you are religious that you know that they went to a better place. If you are atheist then know that at least they aren’t suffering and they live on in you. Hope you feel better soon mjseu.

Somehow I have not expressed my emotions in the past and I have tried to be positive and optimistic, but now I have decided to allow myself to express my emotions, because these emotions are real and I do not want to runaway from these by being overly positive. I do not need to be in control of my emotions.

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For the first time in my life I have decided to be a real human being, I do not know where this process of expressing my emotions freely will take me, but somehow I feel relieved, I do not need to hide my emotions any longer, but I can discuss these openly, I may like where this takes me, at least it feels good now …

I think having emotions is a good thing. My emotions have always run very deep although people, for some reason, have been unkind to me and treated me like an animal with no feelings. I digress. I have good days and bad days. We all get sad. I had a sad spell today but am better. Hang in there and know that we all care about you and want you to be happy.

I only feel emotions when I’m getting close to my menstrual period.

I think this new freedom that I allow me to express openly my emotions will be eventually positive and it may take me somewhere enabling me to become a new man without hiding my deep emotions, the process may take some time, but I like this already now. I am a strong person and I think I’ll be ok, but I allow these emotions to change myself and my life.

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I was so sad today that I wore my totally black clothing … I also heard something… actually somebody called me Russian again, well I just need a hat and then I look like a Russian orthodox jew … they can call me whatever

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