AM I SCHIZOPHRENIC? Please help im very confused..! =/

Hallo I am very confused about what is going on with me…! =/
I am not sure how to start this and how to make it as short as possible… but I will try my best…!

One thing is that i use drugs since age of 15… i started with weed and for few last years i am playing with heroin… been off and on many times… now i am mostly on methadone… i stoped my heroin totally for about a week when my head went totally crazy…!

Basically i had 2 main effects… one was constantly imagining people… like when you remember something from your past and go true it in your head… but the problem was that i was doing it all the time nonstop… i cud not concentrate on anything… if i would try to do some work i would just wonder off talking to my self… often in full voice… and laughing… my girl told me i need to see doctor already from 1st day it started… but i had these cases before and i was thinking its just from my drug use…! I actually had several cases with this in my life and actually i wanted to see doctor about it already several times before… but i somehow just totally forgot about them…like they newer existed…! It continued for like 2 weeks and i started to get voices…mostly when i was going to sleep… they were mostly just calling my name or saying little sentences which i cud not properly understand…one of voices was my mothers…! When i had voices i had hallucinations to… but dream like hallucinations… like if i would get suckt in some dream…! After like 2 weeks i just sited down one Saturday morning and started thinking what is wrong with me and as soon as i had idea that i might have some real issue with my head i remembered many other cases with same effects and same feeling that i had before but of which i had totally forgot…! It was like if my brains would hide those events from me… it was really surprising for me because many of those events was not so long ago and i really should remember them because they were really important to me…! It included some psyhologicaly hard events from my past… i come from violent family… and i had another really fukkt up issue from my childhood… which is to crazy for me to tell and it would be really long to explain it… but actually my head started going crazy when something reminded me of those events…! It seems to me like drugs always have helped me to deal with it… drugs was like best thing that ever happened to me… i started drugs at age of 15 and it was the best thing that ever happened to me… i think i start to understand why i was always thinking so…!

I just want to know what is going on with me… i am getting really crazy ideas of how to deal with this… but i am trying to keep it together because of my girl… i somehow newer care of my self… last years of my life i have been looking for trouble…! I newer start problems with anyone… but i can become very aggressive when defending my self or someone around me… and i am like looking for fights… and i have pretty crazy violent and suicidal beliefs…!

One thing i always had and i am like famous for is my really terrible memory… like i can easily forget 4number bank card pin… if i don’t use it for more than a week…! I almost newer remember how a person looks like… for example i cud have nice time with some girl at some party i cud spend all evening with her and next day she cud say hi to me on the street and i would have no idea who is she…! Like i would remember she as a person but not how she looks like…! In most cases i need to meet people several times and get to know them pretty good to remember them… no matter how hard i try to remember them… because sometimes its important to remember so i really try but i cant…! Sometimes my friends tell me of something we were doing few days ago and i don’t remember anything of it at all… i often think that other people are making mistake… because i am sure i haven’t don that… but i suppose i actually might have…! =/

I would be really thanksful if anyone cud tell to me how they think is that schizophrenia or no…!
And i don’t think i will be able to get any prescription medication in UK… same with doctor… so i am checking how to fight it by my self and with no medications… except some vitamins… so far i read that exercise is good and i think it was B3 vitamin…! If anyone know any other things i cud do to improve my condition please let me know…! I am stressing out because i have my little online business and its totally falling apart now… so i need to get my concentration back… ASAP…!

Thank you for reading and sorry for spelling…!
I will be happy for any comments…! =)

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It could be schizophrenia, it could be a much more serious and degenerative physical illness (think ‘brain tumour’), or it could be nothing at all. Only a licensed physician can diagnose this and that is after doing all of the necessary tests and ruling everything else out. Strangers on the Internet aren’t much help here, I’m afraid.

If it is schizophrenia, you will likely need medications. The majority of us do. The odds of a schizophrenia sufferer not needing medication for life are very, very small indeed. Also, schizophrenia that goes untreated almost always gets worse, to the point that you may do additional damage to yourself that you can’t recover from. The sooner you get help, the better your outcome will be. This is now becoming firmly established by the latest research.

The two best things you can do are:

  1. See a doctor for diagnosis immediately.

  2. Begin early intervention for psychosis, if that is what you are experiencing, and follow all related medical advice including taking medications as prescribed.

Good luck and let us know how it turns out.

Pixel.

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thought i would say hi :heart:
you need to get diagnosed properly by a pdoc/shrink
you need to get rid of your drug habit for good
as far as i know if you turn up in the u.k at a doctors surgery they will refer you to a shrink ( my sister and brother live in the u.k )
i admire you wanting to go down the road of no meds…but it is not an easy one and not for everyone.
take care :alien:

You need a doctor. Seeing things isn’t normal. It could take you awhile to find the write meds for you but it’s not hopeless.

I agree with everyone. You need to see a doctor immediately. All the drug use is not good for you especially if you are schizophrenic and going off drugs could make things even worse for a while. It’s best to see a doctor and be honest about everything. good luck and keep us posted

Or it could be acute opiate withdrawal. Stop playing with the stuff, or you will go crazy.

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Yea i know what you guys mean with i should see doctor and no1 here can tell me my diagnosis…! Tough that’s my biggest problem i am trying to see doctor… i am registered with drugs treatment and they have prescribed me methadone… so first i went to them as soon as i cud… on Monday since i realized something is wrong with my head on Saturday and they were close till Monday…! They told me that they cant help me much with that and told me i have to go talk to my GP…! So i went to my GP and told them i have voices in my head and hallucinations and they made me appointment…! So i went to my appointment but GP told me that she can try to send a request to that sort of doctor that i need but since i am with drugs treatment they will most likely not accept me… but she told me she will still try and that i got to wait for a letter 2-3 weeks… but most likely it will be NO…! As i said i am not originally from England and it might seem weird for English people but for imigrants like me its very hard to get help like that…! It seemed to me that my GP was thinking that i am after some benefits or something like that… even tough to be honest i can make very good money with my business… i just need my head to be operational… and since i got my business on my name i don’t think i would get any benefits anywhey… and i explained about it to her and told her as much as i cud about my condition and history of it…! It seemed that she would not even try to send that request for that doctor for me… before in the end i told her that i live with my girlfriend and she is scared of me… and i am scared i don’t do anything to her… than she somehow changed her attitude a bit… but with out that she was even like smiling at some point… like showing me that she doesn’t believe me… or i don’t know maybe its just my head playing tricks with me… but i don’t think so…! So what i figured to do was to stop heroin and methadone as fast as i can…! I haven’t been properly on heroin for about 4 months… since i got methadone…! But the thing is that more days i stay off from it more my head goes weird… usually till point when i cant do any work… and than i have no options and i take little bit heroin… for one day… few times a bit more than one day…! I was thinking that my head is going crazy from methadone… but i told that already long ago to doctor which is prescribing it to me and he told me it should not be like that…! Basically now i realized that its simply heroin that takes off my head problems… it totally makes sense… i was struggling so long with it… normally you feel bad first days after it and every next day you get better but for me now as soon as i get better from heroin withdraws my head starts going crazy and longer i stay off more it goes crazy… i was off for longest period of time i been off from it since i started last time… when my head went crazy…! And i had exactly same issues before i started heroin again 2 years ago… before i did not see any connection between it… i was off from heroin for about a year and than i got in some massive stresses and my head went crazy same like now… just not so bad… but exactly same feeling…! I just cud not take it anymore and i met someone who was using heroin so i was like fukk it and took once and it sorted my head out but i didn’t even notice it… i simply totally forgot about it… same as all other times when i had these episodes…!

And i would be happy to try some medicine but if i cant get to see doctor how will i get medicine…! =/
I am having some ideas how to get to doctor but they arent very nice… i suppose my friends idea about going to hospital and telling them that i am suicidal is the best one… tough i am actually more violent suicidal and i don’t want to lie to them…! =/

Thanks for replays tough! =)

I’m in the USA.

My friend wanted to go into a mental hospital, and she was advised by a professional to say she was suicidal so that she would be taken.

Well, my friend was taken all right, but she hated the hospital, and they wouldn’t let her out for the longest time!

The mental health system is a little bit hard to navigate. Therefore, it is good you started this discussion.

Jayster

Yes that is exactly what I think… health systems are so complicated… there is many cases when people end up dead just because they weren’t smart enough to get true the system fast enough…! =/

What seems really weird is that UK actually is famous for its high class health system… and same other western countries are spending so much money on it and have high standards and values when it comes to health…!
But in the same time I come from a small eastern European ex-soviet country which have very bad economics but in the same time there I cud just go to hospital talk to someone from mental health department and most likely get to speak to specialist in maybe 10 minutes… in many cases straight away…! In worst case I would have to slip a tenner in some pocket and all would be sorted for me… hehe… funny but sometimes corruption is better I suppose…! =/

I figured out that I will do all I can to see some specialist as fast as I can… since that’s what everyone was recommending to me… and yea it does make sense… I was working on it but it seemed hopeless so I was thinking of other options like self healing…! I am waiting for one of my British friends to come home from his dog walking and ask him to show me were is hospital… he told me he will help with it as much as he be able to…! And in hospital I will just be honest with them and ask them if I can just get to speak to any that sort of doctor for atleast 5minutes…!

Thanks all for your replays and I will try to make sure I post how I was doing with it…! =)

Same issue here in Canada. When something is ‘free’, demand will always outstrip supply, so the ‘free’ product is rationed. Oh, and health care is ‘free’ because the cost is hidden in everything else. Americans freak out when the come up north to Canada and see what we pay for fuel and food.

Pixel.

I know exactly how u feel that’s how it started for me, familiar voices first after years of drug abuse. I’m sorry my friend see a doc asap in the states , once u say suicide ur in a facility so no clue, but in my estimation u r in the infancy of shciz. 4 certain write me back , ive dealt w it 4 years ill ive u my humble guide on how 2 cope if it gets worse. MM