Just out of curiosity, what would you do if you woke up in natural remission, were perfectly normal and did not need psychiatric medications?
I will start planing my feuture
I would have a celebratory bowl of oatmeal and then I would go about my business. I would just do the same thing Iām doing now with my life, just do the best I can with what Iāve got.
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Iād yell like fuuuuuck yesssss!
Now -not much. The opportunity for a better future has long passed. A couple of decades ago might have been a different story.
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Further my education, get a good job, and then some friends.
I often wonder this. I donāt know if I would pick up where I left off or be incapable of adapting back to being ānormalā.
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i would get in my spaceship and fly awayā¦and seek out insanity, a lot more interesting !
take care
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I start to do all the things Iām missing out on now. Like, having friends and living a normal life.
I honestly donāt know. I donāt know who I am without the schizoaffetivenes and ausburgers indicators.
Would I start enjoying live action shows and films more? Most sz and people with ausp (or so Iāve read) tend to like cartoons. I can tell exactly what Peter, Space Dandy, and especially Spongebob were feeling and to some extent thinking. My Dad likes to narrate in detail what is going on in the movie we are watching. Itās annoying now because I have gotten a lot better, but sometimes it still answers things I wasnāt aware were going on or didnāt understand. Many times I have had to ask him why a character was doing or saying something because the explanation was in their face.
There are so many other things like that. Things that although you could say might not be caused by sza or ausp. but at least are common factors or hallmarks of it. I fit all of those things so well. I wouldnāt be me improved like I am on the medicine, I wouldnāt be me at all.
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Actually, I think I am completely sane, just very ill sometimes. You yourself told me I qualify as legally sane.
I have no idea what would happen if I woke up cured, no symptoms, no need for any meds, or therapy. Iād probably be like Nick and keep doing exactly what Iām doing.
Iād totally keep my job. I love my job and it pays well, and I get to be outside in the gardens. Plus itās flex time.
Iād keep my apartment. I love this place and itās right on the water. Iād keep surfingā¦ If I had a chance to open a surf business, be it a shop or surf school Iād still have to take the licensing stuff that Iām trying to get through now.
Iād still stay in school and try and figure out what my major would be. For the job I have now, it would still be horticulture, for the idea of my own businessā¦It should be business.
Iād keep my girl friend. I like her and sheās patient and nice to people. Plus she gets my jokes. 
Sz or NOT Sz Iād still worry about my kid sister getting out into the world and finding trouble. But Iād most likely be able to handle it better. Iād still have a large family with large family chaos.
If I woke up completely recoveredā¦ Iād try taking showers instead of baths. Thereā¦ that is what Iād do differently in my life if I woke up and didnāt have SZ any more. 
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Be rather lonely I suppose. I have grown use to my voices and āimaginary friendsā. If i woke up and all of that was gone, I would have to re-learn how to ā¦ live. I also imagine my personality would be somewhat different, maybe I would be more goal oriented and see more things through to completionā¦ that would be nice. But maybe I would loose my creativity. Much of my artistic inspiration comes from my Sz, I would be at least on some level a bit lost without it.
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I think I would keep on doing what I am doing- go to school for free and stay on the powerlifting team. I think I would take extra classes instead of just 4 or 5 each semester. I would demand that I go to graduate school and earn a PhD, I would have zero excuses not to. When I woke up the first day after taking 120mg of Geodon, I was anxious and had a restless left leg, but my mind was clear and I stood in the sun smoking a cigarette in my backyard and decided that I really could one day be āDrā and help people.
I just wonder if the schizophrenia is my motivation- if the threat of relapse and being one pill away from insanity is what makes me go down and get up when I lift weights, if it is what makes me walk to class with a no ā ā ā ā ā ā ā around look on my face and sit down to make an A, which I do, I wonder what my motivations really are sometimes.
I think I see schizophrenia as my enemy and live well to spite it. I was given a morbid prognosis at 19 when I was diagnosed and evaluated, and it has made me angry, and that makes me strong, literally and figuratively. I basically was told that schizophrenia would end my life by the age of 40, that I would lose my ego and commit suicide or die of alcohol poisoning within 20 years, with only one or two friends.
Basically, I wake up after sleeping for 10 hours (meds) and am a zombie and that alone makes me feel like ā ā ā ā and then I drink coffee until I am not a zombie and then normal life happens. If I didnt oversleep, have to take so many pills a day and stay in a comfort zone of behaviors, I would train harder and study harder. Too much of anything at this point triggers my symptoms. Too much stress and I lose sanity points. Too much physical exertion and I lose sanity points.
I would be conflicted, I would have to find new motivation other than saving myself, first and foremost. But my long term goals would stay the same. Graduate school and one day have my own office and be āDrā. But I dont know if I would have the same desire and willpower that I have because of the odds I am beating. Life might be boring and not a challenge at all without a little psychotic ā ā ā ā here and there and the threat of relapse looming over me.
Its very common for people on my med to build up a tolerance within a few years and find themselves in a straight jacket. It might happen, I remind myself of how bad my condition is untreated. Sure I have insight, but I already know that if I lost it again I would hurt myself.
I donāt know if I would be able to cope to tell you the truth - All I have known is mental illness. I do not know ānormalā never did - Rob
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Mortimermouse, can you please define what you mean as ācompletely saneā and āperfectly normalā?
Not schizophrenic or bipolar or anything like that.
iād go nuts!! lol!! have been a little or much sz all my life almost so I donāt know any thing else.
judy
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Check out everything to make sure itās real. Go outside + take everything in.
Iād probably go to restaurants and theme parks and other public places that spike my anxiety at the moment. Iād get back into computer programming and maybe make a job out of it, or Iād go to school to be an engineer or physicist. Hell, if I was ānormalā Iād be all 3 like Ironman.
Yea, so itās decided, if I were to randomly wake up in remission, Iād be Ironman.
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If you need help with programming/software engineering please feel free to ask me. I do these things professionally.
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