with the new year quickly approaching, i need to make a change. since late 2011 i’ve been basically sitting at home doing nothing, recovering from the psychotic break which landed me in jail and the hospital.
i’m 22 now and i haven’t gotten anywhere in life. i don’t have a job. i think about going back to school but i’m scared to do something like psychology then come out and not be able to find a job. i think about doing multiple things, but i can’t make up my mind, or either i think that i won’t be able to take it through to the end. i’ve been considering suicide more and more, but something still keeps me alive.
i’m just directionless right now, it’s making me feel terrible, and i honestly don’t know what to do. i can’t live off disability forever.
Amplitude, I got diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia in 1980 when I was 19. I spent a year in a group home and then 8 months locked up in a psychiatric hospital. It was no picnic, I suffered daily and went through hell. But through a series of small steps I got a job when I was 22. You are still young. A lot of people schizophrenic or not don’t know what they are doing at that age. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you to try to do different things and see what works and what you’re good at. Don’t expect too much out of yourself. Maybe just get a little job and coast along working part-time and see what opportunities pop up. Not everybody else is a success at age 22 either. Anyway, good luck.
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Try finding a part time job. Just to try if you can work. Work makes you more social and that makes you feel better. Later on maybe you can work full time.
When I got ill I isolated from everyone. After being on sick leave for two years I started slowly with two hours/week. 8 months later I was working full time again.
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