What do you tell people you do for work?

What should I say when people ask what I do for a living? (they put me on disability for Schizoaffective and BDD). I’ve told a few people I’m on disability but that doesn’t seem appropriate for casual acquaintances. I could tell them I’m ‘retired’, which is mostly true, but then it’s weird if I don’t explain it. And I don’t want to sound stand-offish and say ‘none of your business’. What do you do?

I just makes jokes and say I play on the internet all day. I don’t really go any deeper unless there’s reason to or I feel like talking about it.

Most people just assume I have a job that allows me to play online or that requires a lot of interneting for whatever reason. They don’t tend to automatically assume that I actually just play online all day because I don’t work.

I tell people I’m taking a break and living on savings at the moment.

I tell them I do nothing. That usually makes them shut up. :wink:

If not I just start talking about my daily chores and routines.

I tell them, I’m a disable veteran. If they ask why I’m disable, I tell then I don’t like to talk about it.

I tell them I retired early - No one really asks anyway

I tell them the truth.

Im being put through a horrendous process called alchemy by interdimensional beings.

Also known by some as torment.

It’s so damn stupid sometimes, you’ll get tormented for long and dudes will be like “hey man, you just need to care more. Try harder.” Im being haunted to death and killed and they are like “You don’t clean enough man. Why don’t you care about your appearance at all?”

You never want to hear during torture that “You just have to make better choices man. You have to change.”

I don’t give a F#ck I tell people the government screwed me and forced me into mental health and bought me from my family which is technically what happened and put me on disability so I left work and retired and will never work again and if you think i’m a dole bludging f#ck your just an uneducated piece of ■■■■ that can go f#ck yourself because you don’t know whats going on in this country.
most are pretty chill about it though some people get angry but idc.
I could really care less for some randoms opinion at the end of the day or what they think or see - I could have the hottest chick anyones ever seen come up for me and ask for a root and i’d turn around and say get f#cked.

I tell them I work in roadworks

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I’m retired due to a physical disability, but I told the lawyer that I still could bust my butt digging up plants by the roots all day in my back yard, only that I had to take a break and sit down every ten minutes for 15 minutes at a time and so they couldn’t find me work at that point.

I tell people I’m rich

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I’m in college so I get that excuse. And @brucewillis shouldn’t you be saying your busy being a BA and throwing Alan Rickman out of buildings?

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I just say that I don’t need to work and that I have my own income. I leave out the benefits part.

For the people I don’t know well I just tell them that I’m on early retirement. For professional people like my gp I tell the truth. For other professionals like my ophthalmologist and dietician I tell them that I’m medically boarded due a psychiatric reason. Most intellectuals accept the explanation when you tell them that and they won’t ask me any further questions and I don’t elaborate. For people I just newly meet I tell them I do nothing and I’m on pension.

Tell them you’re in-between jobs. Simple, quick, and convenient.

Im open about my illness. I usually just tell them straight. You know its interesting to hear a diagnosis of schizophrenia. Its something interesting to hear.
I used to feel stigmatised when I had depression but I learned to open up about such things and ell people.

Tell them you’re an eccentric millionaire.

I got a full time job it’s called stayin alive.

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I tell people my name is Peter parker and I work for a news paper company in new York. The daily bugle :wink:

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You could say you have a condition that makes it hard to keep a job and you are not working. The people that will accept this is the people you want to be around.