Using my voice to make a friend

After being MI, I was lost as to how to make a friend. Not that I REALLY wanted to. When I decided I REALLY wanted to, I started out by just saying “Hi” when I see her. Now, it hasn’t advanced much, but I’m into complete sentences. I had not thought that making a friend is a conscious act and one has to earn it but that is so. Nothing accidental about having a friend.

I think most friendships happen by circumstance. Two people are working on something together, so they have a reason to interact, and then a friendship naturally forms. When that’s not the case, and you have no reason to be speaking to someone, but you still do, it can be a little scarier because there is no question about it, you are obviously seeking friendship. A lot more vulnerable.

I have to work at keeping relationships simple because I lose interest fast when the conversation gets complex. Also, I don’t tend to believe in people which makes me treat adults like children which gets resented.

Trying that might be interesting for me - very slowly and maybe stopping at a point for a longish time. Fast talk sweeps me up and I get lost in the conversation. Carried away in a bad sense. It’s hard to get back afterward. A little known friend. I know someone like that now actually…

I become fake with adults when I distance myself like that. And they usually know it - not always on the surface.