- Add eggs
- fry it remorselessly
- ???
- Profit
N.B. doesn’t work with some beverages. don’t try to fry tea guys.
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I lol’d !
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Damn, thanks for the advice man 
lol
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This will most likely be said to be way way way way way way way way way off topic by the moderators, but I just had a delicious chicken burger. Normally you cook the burger in the oven or in a frying pan as it says to do on the box, and it says not to cook in a microwave oven. But what I do is put it in a bowl, add water spices and salt, put it in the microwave oven, cover the bowl with one of those black bowls that your frozen dinners come in, and set to full power for up to eight minutes.
The boiling water makes sure that the burger is fully cooked, but most of all it makes the burger big and juicy rather than drying up and shrinking which occurs if using the usual cooking methods.
Yummy !
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That is some easy peasy sz-avolition-inspired burger 
not an off topic by a bit !
After all the alternative was eating frozen processed meat,
and you made it way better by cooking it with minimal effort haha
Have fun man !!
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You can always fall back on ketchup!
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