The Dark side of Dr Zen

Iam completing leaveing before the ones i love pass away, i couldn’t stand living a life with out them. iam alone in my world a lonely apartment in the city ,with cold tenpled people. frown most of the time. and with health issue the makes me be care for by people thinking of me as a thing to make money off of. not a form of pride anyone can stand. so why not leave. i’m getting old and pain rules my life each and ever day, and the only relief is a pill i run out of each month. now i am a world man. and after there shine only light. and I my fiend. well


Where are you going?

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you are scaring me @TheGreatestDrZen !! what kind of talk is this? please please don’t hurt yourself.


DrZen , that’s pretty distorted thinking. :frowning:

Can you please talk to someone in real life and let them know how you feel ?

I’m worried.


@DrZen Please reach out for help if you’re thinking of harming yourself. Your loved ones would be devastated if something happened to you.

I’m sorry that you’re having health issues and that you’re having chronic pain issues. Have you let your doctor know about the pain? There are effective techniques for managing chronic pain.

Here are some crisis intervention resources:


You sound like you’re having a really tough time @DrZen. This is the time to reach out for help, from family or a crisis center or somebody. Please don’t do anything to hurt yourself. Best wishes.


Please don’t hurt yourself Dr Zen.
Talk to someone you trust.
Contact a crisis center if need be.
We care about you.

Take care of yourself!


I agree with the other posters.

I hope you will feel better and have positive things to look forward to .

Love to you from us.


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Hey Zen…Don’t give up matey. You have to fight it. I know your lonely and in pain but those are things that can be fixed. You can’t.

If you need it ask for help. Especially that pain management. I know it’s hard these days but keep fighting!


i for one always liked you and your friendship with us here on the forum. i am sure many others like you as well dr. zen.

i wish you could feel all the love we feel for you here and then you would maybe feel better.

hugs, judy


I love you, Man.


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Hey - don’t let yourself go mate. Hang in there. There are dark times, no doubt about it, and we’ve all been there, but there are good times as well if you hang in long enough to see them. Please speak to someone you trust who can help you, or call a crisis hotline. Please don’t do anything to hurt yourself, you will be missed here.


hey drzen, i like your drawings on here, please dont go

Dr. Zen you seem to be so creative and enlightened that one would feel you weren’t even sick but I see now that things have turned badly for you. I look forward to your posts and would be sad if they disappeared. Hang in there man.


I can totally understand the chronic pain issue as I’m unable to work due to my neck, back, and leg/hip pain. I used to take 15mg Oxycodone 4x/day in order to be physically functional. But I was cutoff in 2016 after the CDC announced there was an opioid crisis, so now doctors no longer want to issue opioids here for chronic pain anymore! What the hell do these doctors expect those of us who are legitimately suffering with pain to do? They literally hold our lives in their hands but totally fail us because they aren’t actually treating the pain anymore. It F’n sucks!!

But even though I’m sometimes in so much pain I’m barely able to walk, I won’t let myself focus on the “here and now” because that is very depressing and will totally break my spirit. Instead, I stay focused on the “possibilities” and how I want my life to be…NOT on how it is right now. As long as I am gradually moving forward in some way, even if it as simple as learning something new…it gives me motivation and reassurance that I am indeed improving in one way or another. That is truly gratifying in itself! :slight_smile:

If you just need a friend to talk to even if it is just to listen, I am here for you! I’m VERY VERY easy to talk to and genuinely care about people. I have no problem even sharing my phone number with someone if they need to talk to someone who truly understands what they are going through or struggling with! I used to be a family counselor years ago so helping people is part of who I am. Just send me a PM if you’d like to have a convo offline? That actually applies to anyone on here as people are much more important to me than my privacy is. Sometimes just having a true friend to talk to who genuinely cares, that in itself can sometimes be enough to hold on and keep moving forward when you’ve lost all hope! Feel free to hit me up! :wink:

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