SZ/SZA does anyone else disassociate?
Multiple pdocs and pnurses have told me its not something SZ sufferers usually do but I regularly pop completely out of my head, like I’m viewing the world in third person. This can occur if I’m doing something or not, with people or alone, it doesnt have to be anything stressful, anxiety causing or testing either. It usually feels like someone else takes over. It’s not that I disagree with what I’m saying or doing at the time it just feels like I’m listening to it rather than doing it. Or I can look down and immediately think “whos fkin feet are those?”.? i’m already considered rare by my pdoc as I’m 95% visual and liliputian, voices are not my strongest hallucinations by a long way. Which he says is pretty rare.
Is this as unheard of as they say, do i have Depersonalisation Identity Disorder as well as SZ? Or is it just normal SZ and not in all the books?
I’ve dissaschoiated for almost my whole life now. I’m pretty good at it and don’t even realize I’m doing it. I think its when you have had a traumatic experience happen when you were Young
I’ve had depersonalization experiences as well although not very often, thank goodness. It’s very distressing to me when it happens. It usually happens to me when I’m under high stress for some unknown reason.
I just looked up disassociation to get a better understanding. I think I do this, but I wasn’t really traumatized. I know people who were more traumatized than me and they don’t do this. Never thought of myself having to deal with trauma…
My friends and family cannot relate nor understand what I go through everyday. They expect me to be how I was before my illness. I relied on NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) for socializing and several times I was in a Partial Hospitalization Program that my Psychiatrist recommended. The Therapist that worked with us was very good at her job. It helped for me to be in a group setting with others who had similar struggles… This forum helps too.
Sometimes I will feel like I am floating through a tv program instead of walking. Like everything looks like it is flat and filmed while I glide around. It’s really weird and distressing.