I am on more medication than I was before my last psychotic breakdown. I am starting to very reluctantly believe that in spite of my best efforts, I may never be able to work a full time job for more than a few months. This realization hasn’t been easy to accept, the last thing I want to do is have to live on disability for the rest of my life. Is anyone else struggling with working, and not being able to work??
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It is very common to struggle with employment when you have this diagnosis. Most people with schizophrenia do not have jobs. You will find many people here who can empathize with this.
Welcome to the forum! 
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I know how you feel, to an extent. My breakdown cost me a full-time job I enjoyed and hadn’t even been at for a year. I’m stuck right now because I had to file for disability and am awaiting a decision on that. I still have the will to work but I don’t know if that’s enough. I’ll only get to work part-time if I’m approved for disability anyway.
Sending lots of positive vibes your way.
Even though I’m working, I find some days it can be a struggle, though I still push myself even on hard days. I do manual type labor, I help package things and use a computer to input information in, it’s the computer work and the pace of the work I do that gives me struggles.
Many people I know who’ve only had one episode still work or go to school. If you are in this category, I actually think there is a fair chance you can work again if you are willing to put in the effort. Part time is a good idea. I go to day treatment and it is busy so it definitely feels like days off to enjoy the beach make a lot of difference.
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I usually don’t last long at a job before I end up in the hospital after having a break down. Part time work is easier than full time work, I can usually hold down a part time job for a bit longer time. It is difficult, but I do my best. At my last job in construction I had a terrible day towards the end, I spent a quarter of it walking around unable to remember what I was supposed to be doing with overwhelming positive symptoms. Other times I was so ill I couldn’t hear the instructions over my symptoms. It sucks because I am scared to tell my employers about my schizophrenia. In the past I have had a boss tell me that I should go be a greeter at Walmart instead (which does not pay enough) and sometimes people think that people with mental illnesses should be terminated because they think we are all homicidal maniacs. I am starting to think that I should just work a full time until I have a breakdown, then rely on disability until my symptoms are back under control, and go back to work. Sometimes I think I would be doing better if I hadn’t been through so much sexual abuse and abusive relationships. PTSD and all the psychological damage from abuse I have endured has had huge impacts on my mental health. I start to feel like living with my mental illness is impossible sometimes, but I am just going to live the best life I can. My life might be hard or imperfect, but there is no point in just giving up, doing nothing with my life and collecting disability. I need to feel productive. But I did find out I can go to post secondary and have some of the costs covered where I live because of my disability. I think I will feel better and more hopeful with more of an education. I just wish there were more agencies helping schizophrenics find work, more understanding, and less discrimination in the work place. Wish me luck!!
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I know exactly how you feel. I just got a new job a few months ago (fulll time) and within getting the first few weeks symptoms started coming back so I had to drop it down to part time. But I’m in a bit of a relapse at the moment and am having to call in sick a lot which isn’t great. Hopefully I get back to normal soon or else I can’t see myself being able to keep it up. It’s so hard having symptoms and trying to act totally normal in Work. I don’t think I could ever work full time tbh
I can’t work because the men who follow me show up at my work and harass me. I don’t want to deal with them so I stay home. They thought I was an agent for intelligence and started following me. Well, I thought I was too so I let them think that. But now they won’t leave me alone. They tap my phone and computer and follow me. I can’t have freedom. I don’t want them showing up at my work anymore. So I just stay home.
I had a very hard time not being able to work for a while. Was dealing with psychosis, delusions etc. I finally pushed myself and got a job working in a convenient store but it was too much work. I was dealing with the symptoms on top of that. I wasn’t physically tired but was having a very hard time getting out of bed but I left in a month.
Now I’m working overnight as a cashier with very little to do. I listen to podcasts, browse the internet, or listen to audiobooks the entire time just so I continue to learn and grow and keep my brain active. It’s not hard at all and the pay is alright. But that’s the most I can do. I feel like a complete loser sometimes because I had a lot of great dreams that I wanted to accomplish and I was working very hard towards them until I got struck with the illness.
I’ve read and seen documentaries about people who made full recoveries from this disease but I don’t know when I will get to that point. Stay strong and remember that we are all in this together. I’m sharing my struggles with other people just so you know you are not alone. Hang in there!!!