Gorrister you have a typical defeatist attitude towards you. It is inherent in many with schizophrenia. They give up on their life and refuse to improve themselves. Do you think I am where I am because I gave up? At one point, I almost went to jail. I am sure some people here still remember. Can you say the same about going to jail? Don’t think because I am an analyst now that I have always been in a good place with schizophrenia.
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I respect you guys a lot. Everybody at least trys to make a effort to be nice.
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My cognitive function waxes and wanes. I am sure not better than anyone else but I sure wouldn’t let anyone put me down. Not that anyone has. I really feel comfortable here
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My functioning has ups and downs. Doesn’t make me better than anyone. Being able to function or articulate things clearly At times.doesn’t mean I or others like me deserve less support or a place to feel welcome.
Sometimes I am all word salad-y. Look at a few of my posts before my last hospital trip in early August.
I haven’t seen anyone treat anyone badly. I have seen people have their bad behavior pointed out to them. A lack of empathy on my part was pointed out by a nod and I walked it back.
And I hang out with people I like. Their functional abilities or IQ have nothing to do with it.
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Sometimes the “schizophrenia lite” illnesses like schitzotypal or schizoid can be worse in some ways because they have stronger negative symptoms and start earlier in life. Psychosis can be controlled, negatives , especially strong negatives cannot.it all depends person to person.
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I respect you guys a lot. Everybody at least trys to be nice. I cant get prideful for very long because i start feeling so bad about it that it drives me to low self esteem , quick. Im starting to see it as opposition now that i just have to press through until things balance out. I never understood how you could think your better than someone cuz we are all unique , and just the way we are supposed to be.
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I like to think I’m street smart but I’ve been scammed many times.
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In terms of other people feeling better than others, maybe but who’s to say how others really feel about someone else. And if they do why does it matter. In the first years of my illness after coming out of psychosis I was doing well. But I’m slowly starting to degrade. With all the trouble of addictions and meds that don’t work and crappy circumstances. It’s really taking its toll on me.
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I was in solitary confinement for 5 months 24/7 without medication going insane due to an arrest during my initial episode which was delusional (roaming about town yelling, breaking hotel property, etc). I got thrown into solitary for having a panic attack as soon as I got in and they never brought be back into population. This disease has destroyed my life and I am picking up the pieces, but so many doors feel closed that used to be open.
That was 3 years ago and I have my moments, but a lot of the people here who seem like the disease doesn’t bother them simply aren’t sharing to the degree others are. I know I might come across casual but I just don’t complain as much as I feel like, that’s all.
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No, I’m not. There’s enough misery here without me pouring out more of my own. I have some truly sucky days and I often come home with a head full of rabid squirrels from pushing myself too hard. I’d prefer to focus on the positives, like I mostly kept the rabid squirrels in my head and no one else got bit by them.
This community has enough negative stuff, we need more positives. More inspiration. I need that too, btw.
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Yeah you can’t really tell how an illness effects someone from just reading posts that they make online
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You need to think about the criteria doctors use. You have to be psychotic for 6 months to be given this diagnosis, and it’s not given out lightly. That’s one thing we all have in common and it’s a ■■■■■■■ traumatising experience that can happen over and over again.
Those doing better encourage, those who are not will benefit from shared experiences and a more levelled perspective.
As others have said, I have not posted my personal history on this site. That wouldn’t be pleasant for anyone to read, and I look forward as best as I can.
I am doing better now, but I usually seek this site out when I am not doing so well for the support. I have remained for the moment, because it’s the only real social interaction I have and I want to help if I can or just chat to people.
Writing also allows me to be more considerate than if I spoke to you.
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I know where I came from. I don’t have to justify to myself why I post here. The reason I post my story so often is to show what is possible despite having schizophrenia. This is the point of my stories.
When I first got diagnosed I was severely ill. I lived in a group home and spent month’s sitting by myself in the backyard in an old dirty chair fighting to keep my sanity. I also spent time in my tiny dirty room fighting also, laying on an old mattress for a year because they didn’t give me a bed. After a year of that, I was hospitalized for 8 months. That is where I came from.
I’m not better than anyone else but I am sure as hell luckier then many, many people. I feel on the outside of this site in certain ways, I feel a part of the site in many others. I’ve been told I inspire and give hope to people. I give support as often as I can and amuse myself and hopefully others with humor.
I have noticed in isolated incidents where someone comes across as feeling superior. I hope I don’t come across that way.
I feel lucky that I found this site, it’s very fulfilling and rewarding to encourage and help people in any little way or any big way I can, and people have helped me in return.
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I feels out of place but mostly because most people think I’m nuts but then again I feel like this in general not just here
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Things get better;/can get better… Type in “Schizophrenia healed by the great physician” on YouTube. Ill pop up in a brown shirt at the top. You can see the progression transformation over a year. And thats just a year. Ive had sz for 20yrears and its been so much worse in past years. Im still on meds.
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I’ll readily confess I’m probably less severely symptomatic than a lot of you. My biggest difficulty is socially. Does that make me better than you all? Most definitely -NO! Many of you do better coping with your symptoms than I do with mine, and are to be greatly admired.
As for functioning- I am high moderate/moderately high functioning according to my depot nurse but that is with the support I’m getting. She said when I lived in Essex with less support I was definitely much lower functioning. It’s even stated in my care plan the support is to enable me to continue living independently in my home.
Threads like this always make question whether I should be here or not . They tend to exacerbate the simmering head debate of ‘Am I mentally ill or just socially dysfunctional ?’ . Trying to reality test: Would I have been on the Consta depot for 9 years if I was just socially dysfunctional and a mental health patient for nearly 45 years ? The psych notes say it’s to keep me stable (the Consta).
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im sorry if what i said made you feel less comfortable on here…@firemonkey (i hope i remembered that right)?
i brought this up to try and draw attention to an attitude i felt made me feel a similar way.
im really sorry if you felt attacked in any way, i did not call this attitude out with the intention of pointing fingers at you in particular.
like you, i have unique hang ups which make it hard for me to seek help in an area like this, realizing that i cannot get over them myself can be hard for me to accept.
for me, the worst scenario is for other people (who have a voice on here) to say things which damage the well-being, self-esteem, and confidence of other people, who, as a result of their own limitations due to the illness, are lacking in the ability to express or possibly even understand that they are being mislead, or even damaged.
ive been im that position before, and it only hampered my progress in seeking progress in recovery.
i think that, if we can allow a critical mass of those who are feeling stable in their recovery (not just moderators) to become more empathetic and supportive, then everyone on here can feel better.
the moderators themselves will have less to do.
and i think people like you and i will feel more comfortable seeking support on here.
even if this is simply wishful thinking, we must realize how isolating our illness can be.
for those of us who really need this corner of the internet, i think it would be ideal for it to remain a place where people lift each other up, rather than pushing each other down.
for those of us who feel that we have been made to feel bad: i think supportive and civil discussions about what upsets us can really give everyone some perspective on how we can all do better.
does that make sense?
Whether you had made your post or not I’d still be questioning whether I should be here or not . I feel uncomfortable here for reasons I can’t go into on the forum that are far more upsetting than anything you’ve done.
I do strongly feel that I’m not wanted here . That could be because people don’t like me/think I shouldn’t be here.
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I’ve had about twenty doctors tell me I’m not well, so I don’t feel superior to anyone on this site. But I like to hear that someone is holding down a job, or someone else is getting better. I do feel a little guilt that maybe I could do better, but I don’t feel inadequate in relation to anyone. I understand that jealousies can arise, but those kinds of emotions need to be suppressed. It’s not good to go around comparing yourself to other people.
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Sz taking their medications are always winners or superior cause they are not confused compared sz refuse taking their medications and choose confusion in their minds.
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