Question for the guys

Question, do you treat your female platonic friends the same as your male friends? Or do you behave more tactfully with them because they are women? My friend (I wonder) shared with me in a manner in which he would talk to I think another guy details of his new years eve. And while i hope this one works out even though I"m tired of the one after the other girlfriend, shouldn’t there be a little boundary as I am a woman on some level? Am I like one of the guys or something good grief? Or do I worry too much. And in the end is it different how to approach me as i have mi?

I don’t understand your post. Chances are if he’s talking to you he’s interested in you if that’s what you’re asking.

Unless you’re part of a big co-ed group that he’s going after another girl in the group then he’s probably interested in you for sex and/or a relationship.

No what I mean is should guys tell their female friends about their sexual exploits with their girlfriends or isn’t it down right rude?

It is kind of rude and tasteless. I am thinking that it is possible that he is telling you this because he has other intentions other than being your friend - but I dont know him and therefore could be wrong

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I would tell a girl about my sex life because I want her to know how experienced I am, since I’m not that experienced. I don’t really talk to my male friends about my sex life, I’m shy about it even if it would earn me a high five. Lol.

What wave said too. It depends on the situation also… If he’s a player it’s probably kind of tasteless but in my situation I don’t think it is.

I’d never talk about the intimate moments with my girlfriend to anyone, regardless of gender. That’s very disrespectful to the girlfriend.

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Yeah it all depends - it is difficult to come to final conclusions about the guy and what his true intentions are, when I dont know anything about him.
But I do think it is disrespectful and tasteless, regardless

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I talk to female friends differently than male friends. I will be cruder and more explicit with male friends. Doesn’t mean I’m not on good terms with the females I know, but they have different things they are willing to put up with. And that’s okay.

10-96

Well said.

10-96

That is something that I do not do. There is a mental list of things that are not okay for Mouse, it’s in my head and on one of my best friend’s phones. Huffing ammonia outside out the gym is not okay, for example. Coffee and ammonia at 9pm because I planned on having sex that night was totally not okay, for example. As a side note, I wasn’t delusional, I really was seeing someone and I did see them that night. LOL

But yeah, guys telling girls about their sexual acts is just poor behavior on the guy’s part. I mean guys do have “guy talk”, at least me and my friends, all in our early 20’s do, but talking about sex with the wrong people is just that- wrong! For example, I have friends who are girls, and I simply do not bring up the topic of sex with them. One of them brings it up, she has a fiance and tells me all about it, so I just shared some of my experiences with her, but it is confounded in that we are both psychology students in the honors program and she has epilepsy and I have this ahem problem with my brain. I won’t really say much more than that, that I have talked about sex with a girl before, but she brought it up, and we are pretty open about everything.

The other girls I am friends with? Never. Only once has it been brought up aside from the other girl I mentioned, and it was not explicit, not like creating a porno scene in their head, just like “oh, yeah, I did in fact sleep with that person” when asked about it.

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I do tend to treat my platonic female friends with more respect than my male friends. I imagine others do the same, unless they have no sense of shame.

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hmmmm…I wouldn’t feel comfortable in discussing the intimate moments with my friends regardless of gender. Yeah, I know many friends who discuss those moments with each other. But it kind of makes me uncomfortable when they talk about a specific person and it’s very very awkward when I know the guy or girl. I would then just listen and try to change the subject. In general, I wouldn’t mind listening to them about sex and all but talking is a little something I hesitate to do on the subject…:slight_smile:

I think it’s just fine if you are discussing it to get some advice but if you have other motives then it’s rude and disrespectful…

What happened, has already happened. NEXT time he starts talking about his exploits then make it known to him that you do not want to hear it.

Lol this is funny for me to see because I hate it when guys act differently around me because of my gender. For example, once I was standing in line at the dining hall and two guys in front of me were joking around and one cursed or something. Immediately both looked back at me and apologized, as if I’d never heard a swear word before!! (Meanwhile my roommate who happens to be one of my closest friends has probably the foulest mouth I know)

I never liked to be treated differently because of my gender. Depends on the person I suppose. Definitely let your friend know that that kind of talk makes you feel uncomfortable. Like someone on here said, he’s either trying to show off how experienced he is (my friend’s ex-boyfriend did this on their first date! Bad move! They ended up dating though anyways haha) or he’s probably just incredibly comfortable around you. (I’m not a guy, but was a tomboy growing up, and have lived with 3 brothers all my life, so I’m usually the one my friends go to for guy advice, haha)

I think several different factors may be involved. Depending on this persons age and how he normally communicates with people, the way that he talked to you, may just be who he is and how he talks to people.

In some ways I get to see the difference in generations between my husband who is 58, myself 42 and my children. My children’s generation seems to talk fairly openly about things that I would not have at that age. Sexual encounters and details can be discussed like my generation would discuss the weather.

I tend to be rated G all the way. I don’t talk about the intimate moments with my girlfriend in public or with others. They are between my Gf and I.

I don’t like swearing. So I don’t use it… in any company. I don’t think I talk or act any different around my friends or relatives who are male vs. female.

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I don’t swear hardly at all around my wife or daughter. I am trying to swear less, period. I come from a rough background so I tend to revert to old behaviours when under duress. I’m not proud of it.

10-96

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