Please Check out my Book

Diary of a Crazy Girl

Support independent publishing: Buy this book on Lulu.

Please check it out. :smile:


$25.50 is awfully expensive for me, probably also for a lot of the people on this forum. May I make a suggestion? Post the first chapter of the book, so that people will have an idea of what the book is like, so they can know whether or not they would like to buy it. Right now, there are no reviews, there is no synopsis, there is no way to know what the book is like. Good luck with it.


Sorry, I get my books for free. :books:

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There is a preview on there you just have to click preview.

Congrats on writing that. It looks good! If I dont have a fuckup relapse with booze or schizophrenia, I plan on going to grad school and becoming a professor. I think I will write a book if I get a PhD. Just to show what it is like to appear normal but be insane on the inside. My maternal family didn’t have a clue I was schizophrenic until they were told, I was unmedicated, psychotic, drinking day and night and showed up to family functions and was rather quiet (had whiskey in my coffee of course) but would answer questions about things very clearly and rather intensely. I remember some topic about the brain came up, and I had just taken honors physiological psychology, which is basically an intro to neuroscience, it’s a required course for the behavioral neuroscience major, and I cleared my throat and basically regurgitated what I had been taught any everyone was like “Damn”

I was hallucinating and thinking about delusions the rest of the time. I would make perfect sense when spoken to but was ■■■■■■■ nuts. The guy who evaluated me, which took a week, said that he had never come across a schizophrenic with my MMPI-2 scores who functioned like I did. He said that until he asked me some key trick questions to see how accurate my perception on reality was, he thought I was trying to fake insanity for legal reasons.

I like how my doctors are honest with me. I’m a straight-A psych student so they treat me a little differently- they explain things in psych jargon and such. It’s been very good for me to have strong insight into my brain, my brain is very strange, its ■■■■■■ up, but it works as smoothly as an antique french clock with the right meds and lifestyle. My therapist is a highfalutin 61 year old PhD who has tons of experience and specializes in highly functioning people (among other things, he also specialized in substance abuse for most of his career) he’s actually an elitist, he says people with below 120 IQ’s are “non-sentient beings” and warns me not to get close to them, and he calls me a french clock because he collects antique clocks, and french clocks are very smooth but high maintenance and a single speck of dust can make the whole thing ■■■■ up.

He told me that taking three xanax with a couple of beers at 2am the morning before finals was like taking a sledgehammer to the french clock. He was right, I was nauseous and had a terrible headache, didnt sleep well and puked the next 48 hours.

But yeah books are good. I am all for sharing experiences. Do you mind if I ask how old you are?

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Looks good. I read the preview and it sounds very positive. Thanks for writing it and congratulations on your efforts. I’m sure it wasn’t easy. We will add it to the list of books for people to check out!


120 is above average I.Q. So, you’re not supposed to get close to people with an average I.Q?

I am so sorry but I just have to say, that’s a wee bit sad. That cuts out over 80% of the population.

Sir Richard Branson says that due to his dyslexia he always scores very low on I.Q test. He’s been described as low I.Q.

But he’s freaking “Sir Richard Branosn” rich enough to wear jeans to the Buckingham Palace. Owns many of his own islands, personally funds huge amounts of research in almost every topic, started Virgin Records and Virgin Airways.

So according your therapist Sir Richard Branson is a non-sentient being. Ted Bundy serial killer had an I.Q of 129- 130. So he would be an acceptable and sentient being, by that criteria.

There have been many very great men in history who don’t have a high I.Q. according to the testing.

I.Q. doesn’t measure determination or bravery.


I didnt say I really agree…but my friends are mostly from the prestigious high school I went do and did as well as I did so I end up following his advice…

But yeah IQ tests arent everything, there are many confounding factors to low IQ

Elyn Saks wrote that her IQ was “retarded” while having an episode

What I wrote about IQ scores:

Let’s delve deeper into IQ scores. Did you know that there are different kinds of IQ tests? Some tests are visual, some are verbal, some tests only use abstract-reasoning problems, and some tests concentrate on arithmetic, spatial imagery, reading, vocabulary, memory or general knowledge. A little history. In 1941 Raymond Cattell proposed two type of cognitive abilities as a revision of Spearman’s concept of general intelligence. He hypothesized two forms of intelligence. Fluid intelligence (Gf) as the ability to solve novel problems by using reasoning and declines with age. Crystallized intelligence (Gc) as a knowledge-based ability dependent on education and experience that is resistant to decline. This theory was revived in 1966 by John L. Horn who argued Gf and Gc was only two of ten broad abilities. There are 10 broad abilities (*listed at the end) that are in turn subdivided into 70 narrow abilities. This theory became the Gf-Gc Theory. In 1993 John B. Carroll proposed the Three Stratum Theory which has three levels. The bottom consists of narrow abilities that are highly specialized like spelling, the second consists of the eight broad abilities with Spearman’s concept of general intelligence, for the most part, a representation of the third stratum. In 1999 a merging of the Gf-Gc theory of Cattell and Horn with Carroll’s Three-Stratum theory has led to the Cattell–Horn–Carroll theory and has influenced many of the current broad IQ tests. In 1997 Alexander Luria’s earlier work on neuropsychological processes led to the PASS theory that argued that only looking at one general factor was inadequate for researchers and clinicians who worked with learning disabilities, attention disorders, mental retardation, and interventions for such disabilities. The PASS model covers four kinds of processes (planning process, attention/arousal process, simultaneous processing, and successive processing). It has influenced some recent IQ tests, and been seen as a complement to the Cattell-Horn-Carroll theory. Although modern comprehensive IQ tests still give an overall score, they now also give scores for many of these more restricted abilities, identifying particular strengths and weaknesses of an individual. Still modern tests do not necessarily measure all of the broad abilities. There are such critics as Keith Stanovich who do not dispute the stability of IQ test score however they do argue that to base a concept of intelligence on IQ test scores alone is to ignore many important aspects of mental ability. They fail to account for certain areas which are also associated with intelligence such as creativity or emotional intelligence.

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He is Borg…haha. I noticed the numbers at the bottom when I was reading this…LOL

Seriously though, I’m very surprised this coming from a psych doctor with a PHD. So I guess when I was a child and got a 111 on my first test I wasn’t sentient. then I became assimilated into the sentience collective at some point as an adult and have scored 120s up to 135…

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OK sorry it looks like i pissed on the hornets’ nest again.

IQ isnt everything. Like I posted earlier, Elyn Saks, who is undeniably extremely intelligent, scored in the “retarded” range while having an episode.

I just find myself around highly intelligent friends- I hangout mostly with alums from the international school I went to, and they’re all undeniably of above average intelligence, one the them, the programmer wiz who loves drugs and alcohol, is probably around 130, he and the pothead/lsd kid were in the top of the International Baccalaureate sciences programs and won all sorts of awards. I was the literature buff, I could analyze poems, stories, novels without hesitation and 90% of the time I was right, at least my AP english teacher who has a doctorate from Duke praised me and said I was right. This was when I was in the prodromal phase, a little schizophrenic, mainly symptomatic at night and just a little off during the day.

Im not gonna go boasting about my IQ but is in what my shrink calls the “sentient beings” range, Im not a genius but am pretty bright. I dont have to study hard to make an A, I just have to study briefly but uninterrupted. I get anxiety about school which is disorderly, I always think I am going to fail then make a 98 and finish early.

My shrink just knows that it takes highly intelligent people to get through to me, he notices how I look down on average people and just assumes that because my only strong bonds are with highly intelligent people, I should screen people for intelligence before getting close to them.

For example, my sister’s Fiance is a high functioning autistic man who is in Mensa. He and I hit it off within 2 minutes and step outside during family gatherings to talk and smoke a cigarette. I just click with intelligent people. I have deeper relationships with people who are as smart as me or smarter. My family is full of bright people, my maternal side are all highly educated, most of them including my mother graduated from Notre Dame, and my cousins are all as smart, some of them smarter than me. My sister had nearly identical college entrance test scores as me.

It’s my opinion and my life and I am entitled to say that I only want to get close to people who are as smart as me. I don’t mean to offend anyone, there are confounds to IQ tests (being psychotic is a big one), IQ tests dont mean everything, but for MOST people they do mean something.

Im done, if you dont have at least a 120 IQ, dont reply being all butthurt, it just means Im not going to marry you. Sorry to offend people but I dont enjoy being attacked for having an opinion…I tolerate tons of opinions, I would appreciate it if you give me some respect and let me be a snob, apparently it works for me because I am extremely highly functioning and “as good as it gets” according to my doctors.

Oh, I wasn’t attacking, I just thought it funny a doctor would actually say that, seeing as he probably counsels many whose IQ is under 120.

When I think about it most of the people I have been close with have IQs over 120, some in the 140 range. It’s not that I seek that out or make it a prerequisite for any relationship - it’s just something I find out at some point while developing a close friendship or relationship.
Isn’t it also funny how a lot of people with higher IQs are also diagnosed SZ or bipolar? I have found that quite a bit. I can think of 5 right off hand…

I read in my psychology book that on average, people with schizophrenia tend to have lower IQs than the rest of the population. Don’t know about bipolar. There is a bit of a myth in popular culture that mental illness is associated with a higher IQ.

Probably just personal experience on my part. I’ve read some of that too, but met several people with SZ who have above average high IQ. The 5 I mentioned are all people I have known 3D,…actually there are more than 5 when i think about it, (.the lowest being 123.), and then there are some I’ve seen on the forums here and elsewhere who have higher IQs…

They say the average IQ in the U.S. is 98 now…used to be 100 a couple years ago.

paranoid schizophrenics are bright most of the time. My shrink told me that- it takes intellect to create complex conspiracy theories and such. And my shrink sees mostly upper class people, he specializes in very highly functioning messed up people, he says most of his patients are doctors, lawyers, people with advanced degrees and high intelligence.

Im probably not as smart as half of his patients. Im bright but no genius. I have friends who are geniuses, but I am not on their level. By genius i mean 135+ IQ, some of my friends are for sure around that number, they make me look bad, they made me look like a dumbass in high school, they were basically in their second year of college due to IB and AP credits as seniors.

I’ve been under the impression that intelligence and schizophrenia are unrelated, while schizophrenia can in fact impact intelligence as it affects the cognitive abilities and rationalizing skills of someone afflicted with it. That’s not to say someone can’t overcome it or work against lowered intelligence.

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Thanks for your support SzAdmin. It was difficult to write and took a few years.