…my hands from the guilt and shame
from what I inflicted to my friends and family.
Their pain is red like blood on my hands.
Every day I wash myself in the shower
But nothing else washes the red off of me.
All the pain and crimes I’ve committed,
They will never be justified.
Even if what I imagine myself to be true is actually false,
Nothing else will wash the pain of theirs off of me.
Woe to me, woe to me.
I will never be cleansed. Cursed is me!
I feel the same as u. I have had suicidal ideation over it. Not to kill myself. But to think oh wats the point of livin
They’ve also inflicted pain on you based on your previous posts.
So I guess you’re all even.
Time to move on!
For me the first step is to forgive self.
I forgive myself but actions have consequences that I have to live with. Which sux
I guess I want to do that, but the pain I’ve inflicted on others are still there so there must be a punishment for it. So I guess that’s why I often punish myself.
Punishment is not necessary.
What is the point of inflicting pain and suffering on yourself?
It does not change anything. Only forgiveness is necessary in my opinion.
But you would have to accept forgiving yourself, forgiving others and asking for forgiveness to those you say you inflicted pain on, to move on.
Hope you see that punishment is not necessary.
I’m mostly concerned about my ex, who I’ve inflicted pain on during our relationship because I had sz.
He left me and there’s no way of apologizing to him now.
Plus everyone else (my friends) for me seeking love and being dependent on them.
I’ve lost contact with most of my friends after moving away because I did nothing but hurt them.
Basically no way of apologizing to them.
I can’t move on. The guilt and shame keep coming back and I keep doing the shower ritual thing to pretend it will wash all my sins away. But I keep doing the same thing every day because it will never be enough.
I don’t like the discussion of blood I really wish you wouldn’t talk about blood makes it sound medieval whatever is going on in your mind you shouldn’t blame yourself for anything and you should definitely seek a therapist’s perspective on the extent to which you blame yourself
This topic was automatically closed 95 days after the last reply. New replies are no longer allowed.