I see people on social media posting dun, silly things about their family and it makes me kind of sad. I dont recall ever joking around with my family. I dont remember laughing with my family. I dont remember feeling heard or seen or valued. Just controlled. And put in a place to keep the peace, but i never could.
Its sad to feel like i didnt have much of a childhood.
I get it could have been way worse. But im still sad.
I have good news: You can always have a second childhood.
(It does irritate the spouse, but, oh well.)
Iâm sorry to hear that. It sounds like a pretty hefty weight. I hope you can focus on the now as best you can, and free yourself from some of that stuff. Itâs not easy though, thatâs for sure.
I feel for you. I sometimes mourn my lack of childhood too when I think about how I was always scared of being slapped or punched by my stepfather.
Take care. 
Man everyoneâs family is a Rockwell painting on Facebook!
Itâs not like that IRL.
My version of this is trying to be funny or confident with my family members like I saw people do in the sitcoms. My stepdad beat my ass for that lol.
Yeah that is very true . People only really put the good things on facebook. But i feel this way frequently when im around my friennds families too irl. Especially my boyfriend because his son is trans and they are extremely accepting
Iâm with @shutterbug I live in a group home and get away with being a child as much as I can.
I so need to send you a bag of googly eyes.
I lost my childhood and adulthood as well. I used to be so scared to even talk to my classmates and colleagues. I was a runaway homester. Always feel suicidal and ruminate a lot. Because of my looks. Itâs a physical issue which manifested later as a mental illness due to insecurity. Now I am trying to win back my life with what I can. Itâs hard but have to keep trying.
I have the same issues!
I donât remember my childhood very much. I remember mostly bad things. I wish I could have a happy childhood. I often wonder what it was like to be a child
I didnât have a terrific childhood, but it a lot of times seems better than adulthood. I have to deal with worse people now.
My family fought tooth and nail constantly and it tore my apart and I felt powerless but it was great otherwise. I repressed the bad and lived in my imagination which worked up to adulthood. Then it went bad. A person canât live like that in adulthood.
I can relate to thatw ay too hard. Im sorry friend
The worst part isnât just the grieving aspect of it.
Though I swear a lot of info/therapists or whatever make it seem like all it is is grief.
It isnât.
Youâre also dealing with the aftermath and with a world that still doesnât understand how hard it is to deal with the damage.
Most arenât even aware of the lasting effects or that it affects other at all.
And I truly see and believe that there are actually a lot more people who didnât have good childhoods but they âcopeâ with it through various means.
In short, they never have to become aware of it.
I try to point out to my twin sibling that what everyone (literally everyone) has suffered with and it now impacts us negatively is this kind of traumaâŚ
And often when I do respond to his, âWHY is ___ like that? GOD itâs so annoying.â, I point to their mother and then he goes, âOh yeah⌠that does make sense.â.
But itâs a never ending story. I have to keep repeating myself over and over and over
and over
and over
to the point of insanity.
I had a very rough childhood too. I did 20 years of therapy to start my life over. Iâm doing much better in that regard now. Now Iâm doing therapy again but for things that happened as a young adult. I truly believe you can overcome your suffering. It might take long, hard work. But itâs definitely possible
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