May or may not have schizophrenia

DX'd - Other
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There was no modest way to put it; I was on track to success; I was getting exceptional grades; I was a model student. So much so that I had firmly launched my sights upon aspiring towards the likes of Oxbridge. But lately things have started to go wrong…very wrong. Now aged 15 and after a lot of research, I’m very worried that schizophrenia might be the root of the problem. Here’s why:

DISCLAIMER!!! (I have not been officially diagnosed with schizophrenia and I haven’t discussed the prospect of potentially having the condition with anyone up until posting this topic on a forum).

EARLY WARNING SIGNS

EMOTIONAL/PHYSICAL

–The inability to experience joy or pleasure from activities (called anhedonia): These last 6 months my two key passions - gaming and academia - have lapsed to the point of not engaging in them at all. I mean I still partake in them, just that they feel like routine rather than things I’m passionate about. But the key detractor in my enjoyment of these activities stems primarily from anxiety. I stop doing homework or playing games out of feeling sick or agitated from worry. I’m still not sure whether this can be attested to upcoming exams or the condition itself.

–Sometimes feeling nothing at all: Again, a relative of mine died earlier this year and at the funeral, nearly everyone was crying but I just sat there with a vacant expression…
–Appearing desireless- seeking nothing, wanting nothing: I say I want to go to a top university but my interest has waned considerably. I literally just don’t care…I feel like if the sky were to feel the next day…I would just let it happen.

–Feeling indifferent to important events: Christmas happened yesterday. Got some pretty nice stuff…chucked most it in the bin.

–Feeling detached from your own body (depersonalization): Not sure about this one.

–Hypersensitivity to criticism, insults, or hurt feelings: Now this is one that is irrefutably present in my behaviour. Say, for example if I get any anything less an top marks I will start crying. Simple as that.

All the rest of the early warning signs are listed at:

schizophrenia.com/early signs (can’t post full link! So just type in schizophrenia early warning signs and page should show up).

The only symptoms on the page that I’m unsure about (?) or don’t have (x) are listed below (all the rest of the symptoms I’m sure I have):

-Drug or alcohol abuse (x)
-Smoke or have the desire to want to smoke (70-90% do smoke) - note: this is a very normal behavior for people who do not have schizophrenia also! (x)
-Making up new words (neologisms) (x)
-Lack of insight (called anosognosia). Those who are developing schizophrenia are unaware that they are becoming sick (?)
-Delusions (?) : I’m not really sure what this entails. The only behaviour I thought to be comparable to this concerns a small piece of paper with a weird symbol I’ve drawn and the ‘Happy the man’ poem written on it. Every night I recite it and walk 5 laps of my family’s garden. It’s sort of like this strange belief system I’ve created. Not sure if it counts as a delusion though…
-Hallucinations (?) : This is an odd one, because I’ve most certainly not had any auditory hallucinations, but I may or may not have had a visual hallucination. Since, the other day my and my friend were walking about and I could have sworn I saw my English teacher’s face in three different people. I didn’t point it out to my friend, but I felt really uncomfortable afterwards, like I was being watched. Again, not sure if this counts as a symptom.

I’m still not sure if these traits indicate that some kind of early life crisis is taking place or if I’m developing schizophrenia, but I’m certain that somebody else’s feedback to what I’ve said will be incredibly helpful.

Thank you for posting, and if you have any questions for me post them in the comments below.

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Doctors get it wrong sometimes, so nobody here will be able to diagnose you, and don’t listen to them if they try!

The best thing to do is talk to an actual doctor, who will give you a proper diagnosis. Or they will hook you up with a specialist.

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Based upon what you’ve posted, I doubt that you’ll receive a sz diagnosis. It sounds like severe depression and anxiety to me. But like everhopeful said, seek advice from a psychiatrist so they can properly diagnose you and hopefully help you get your life back on track.

When I was your age, I had severe depression and experienced most of the symptoms that you’ve described. I ended up getting diagnosed with bipolar in my mid 20’s.

Anyways, you’re doing the right thing seeking help so early! I suffered through my teenage years and early 20’s for no reason.

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There are a number of reasons you could be feeling the way you do; it doesn’t mean you have Schizophrenia. At your age, there are a lot of changes going on in your body. I would suggest speaking to your doctor before self-diagnosing yourself. And that’s coming from a hypochondriac.

Good luck!

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Thank you all for your feedback so far. What I’m considering now is whether this is a matter worthy of conversation with a doctor. Since as Anxiety_Orange has noted, it may just be to do with being a teenager.

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It is worth seeing a doctor over. What you described is severe depression. You shouldn’t change from being a straight A student to a mediocre student over night. You’re at a critical stage in your life and having severe depression during it will have negative lifelong consequences.

I regret not seeking help much earlier than I did. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose from seeing a doctor. If nothing is wrong with you, then the doctor will be able to determine that and you’ll have peace of mind.

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