I failed to do anything around the house once again. In fact, I could be doing something right now, but I’m not. I’m sitting here typing instead of getting to work. What is wrong with me? I read that the schizophrenia aspect of schizoaffective disorder can leave a person unmotivated, unable to complete even simple tasks. Is it that, or am I just lazy? I had a psychiatrist tell me that I am lazy once, before my diagnosis. I’ve never forgotten that. It really hurt. I WANT to do things. I just CAN’T. I don’t know why. It’s like seeing things. I don’t want them to be there, but they are. I can’t make them go away. I can’t force it. I can’t force this either. I don’t want it to be there, but it is, and I don’t know how to make this go away. It’s just there- I can’t make myself get up and do things. It sounds so easy, doesn’t it? Just get up and do it! But I don’t; I just sit here, wishing that I were cleaning, shopping, cooking, doing anything else. Does anyone else understand? Is anyone else like this? Am I really just lazy?
I know what you mean. I just really don’t feel like putting effort into things that much. I wasn’t this way before I got ill so I’m pretty sure it’s the psychosis.
I have no drive either no matter how hard I try. It’s like I’m chained up and can’t move no matter how bad I want to. I do have ADD pretty bad so I’ve tried to chalk it up to that, but I’ve had ADD my entire life and it didn’t necessarily affect my drive…just my ability to finish anything.
I got the idea that people doing things for me was them loving me and it wasn’t. It was them not being able to teach me to do for myself. Their way of clinging to me - making me helpless and what appeared to be me clinging to them. I can’t get myself to cook lately but I also know it will be done for me if I don’t. Some of this has developed into dementia. Now I really wonder if I can keep my mental faculties together enough to cook. I think, also, I hold a grudge against myself and don’t want the success.
My dad used to say you can want in one hand, and (sh1t) in the other, and see which one gets full first.
In other words, you can want/talk about doing things (which serves to technically be “doing something” ) or you can do them,
but not both.
Why?
Because the longer a task is put of, the greater the chance it will lose it’s importance- and no longer need doing, or better yet-someone else will do it.
No one wants to do tasks that suck, but people that are efficient know that the faster you complete a task without fuss, the more time you have to actually do what you want.
But I don’t think they suck; I like to do them. I am proud when my house is clean and I cook. I like to get it done, and I miss having dinner with my family. I enjoy the sense of accomplishment. I can’t get myself to read or play my french horn lately, either. I’m not leaving my bed.
I don’t think you’re lazy. The fact that you want to do things but can’t is a good sign you are just demotivated. If you were lazy it would be the case that you don’t want to do things. That’s the difference.
I know how lousy it feels. I go thru the same thing. Good luck in finding the motivation!
Positive symptoms of schizophrenia are pretty well dealt with by modern medications.
Negative symptoms are another kettle of fish.
Negatives can bite hard so you need some strategies. A big thing for me is walking. I try to walk 10k’s a day. I have an activity tracker to keep track and I tick off my little goals…
Little lists can help heaps. Just write down some simple things that need doing and reward yourself if you get them done! It’s hard but it’s manageable with a plan…
I’d say your definately not lazy. Sz has a crazy way with people and most of us have been there!
There have been times when it would have been simpler and easier just to do the task ahead of me, and I still didn’t do it. You can complicate your life putting things off.
I might be able to try little lists, but I have to be careful. I have an OCD with lists. I just recently broke out of writing them. I would spend hours- seriously, hours- a day writing lists about all of the things I had to do, then re-write them again and again until my handwriting looked perfect. Every time something wasn’t accomplished in the order I had written it down in, I had to go back and re-write that list. I was doing this while I was “well”, and it helped to keep me organized in my tasks. I got everything done for months. Once I stopped getting things done, it caused me to break down and feel overwhelmed by the long list of tasks that I just couldn’t accomplish but felt compelled to write for myself. Then I became despondent and stopped writing lists altogether.
Maybe a small one wouldn’t hurt?
I feel that way too. I have a ton of things I need to accomplish, but I just can’t get myself to do it.
I’ve tried making lists, but then I stick too much to the lists and get confused if I skip a step, or forget something.
I don’t know about anyone else but for me cognition , especially executive functioning, has a lot to do with it.
I get overwhelmed by the organisational aspects of a task especially if it requires multiple steps. That leads me into a state of inertia.
Same here for me Tim …!!!
Are you sure its not some symptom of depression that kicked in?
It sounds much like it. This certainly is how i do when the depression just plain makes me feel tired and sleepy. I want to do things. i even have a mental list of exactly what i am going todo that day, yet i just want to sleep.
This usually ends with me not doing anything i wanted or sleeping. Yet just, watching bad television, utube, staring into space…Lol.
Your not lazy. It’s part of the illness. I feel lazy too but I know that it is just a symptom of sz.
I’m the exact same way. I’m sza too. I wasn’t like this when I was young. I was a go getter. I got like this when I got older. And that is typical. Usually the negative symptoms come on as you get older. Especially in women.
It’s so discouraging.
There are days a list works for me, but lately even making a list is a complicated task for me. When I am in that bad of a mental state, I just focus on ONE task for the day. I figure one task getting done is better than no tasks getting done. As soon as I start thinking about all the other tasks I need to do it causes my mind to race and mentally paralyzes me where I just spin in circles. If only my body moved as fast as my mind does, I’d be “Speedy Gonzales” at getting tasks done…
a lot of my symptoms started slow first when i hit puberty and just got worse, but the lack of motivation hit me like a brick out of nowhere one summer when i was at my most symptomatic. some of my other negative symptoms improved on abilify but that one sure didnt
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