It's my hallucinations that make me delusional

Unusual Beliefs
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Today was one of those days. Tried going out to a show. Misinterpreting all the back ground noise. Telepathy telepathy. People commenting on my dual thoughts “yeah he is good at it.”

When I enter a crowd it’s like everyone’s judging me. Every three seconds. A continuous stream.

Was about a foot away from getting hit by a car. I was crossing the road. Alley way to alley way. Whoever it was had to have seen me walking. I was right in front of them. Did they slow down? Nope. ■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■.

I don’t really like the crowd here. They ignore me. Apparently talk a lot of ■■■■.

Don’t think I’ll be going downtown for a while.

I wish I could just think about normal things and feel interested. Used to have spectacular thoughts. Now I don’t ask questions. I don’t care to learn any more. All my efforts go towards figuring out how to stop this mind reading nonsense.

I really don’t know what to do any more. Disbelief doesn’t stop it. When I do believe I have more control over the experience.

I don’t talk about it with people very often. They just smile at me and offer a little sympathy. “If anyone can figure this out its you.”

The best I can come up with is to just be totally thoughtless. Try not to pay attention to any of it. Can only really do that when I have something to focus on.

Been drinking a lot. Actually does a lot for although I wouldn’t recommend it.

Some of you know what it’s like. The perspective and experience that every single one of your thoughts is being read. For me this is inescapable. I can’t be left alone so I have to be alone.

They’re all so ■■■■■■■ happy and confident for the most part. None of them are forced to dwell on the things I’ve winded up thinking about. How ■■■■■■■ terrible we all could potentially be.

Guess the worst part is when no one feels like talking to me. Gotta expect that’s going to happen every now and again. I have no idea what’s going on in their minds. I just know that even with sz I’m a much more consistent and sociable person(in the sense that I’m always willing to talk, to anyone).

Life goes on. I’ll get better at controlling my mind. I have almost no impulses now. Just empty space to fill.

It’s so easy to make assumptions and be judgemental. When you get it wrong people are pissed.

“He’s getting there” someone said aloud.

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Telepathy, can’t explain it yet but yeah it’s there.

Someone is speaking to my mind.

They can speak to people’s minds, helllllooooooo.

Mind your thoughts anakin, before you know it you’ll fall in love and start killing younglings and ■■■■.

We may all be hooked up to the source actually, i wonder who is over there and what they can do in this area?

1 Like
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Again I’ll say, were both crazy. I totally understand you man. I can’t not believe this ■■■■ most of the time.

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you are pretty ■■■■■■■ smart man

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hey,

Take the pills. Works better than placebo. Your six weeks on the pills and your still struggling it’s usually up the dose…that is the way/.

If it’s schizophrenia. Then no amount of your thinking is going to help it. You are just going to suffer. It’s not telepathy. It’s brain chemistry mimicking symptoms that you perceive as what you do. It’s nothing mystical. IT’s nothing magical…it’s just faulty wiring in the old brain box.

I drink almost everyday. It helps me fight the negatives but it’s a bad thing for your health. Fry’s the liver but ultimately it’s pasting over the problems you are developing. It comes back to that again and again …take the pills.

Yeah. You’ll keep on keeping on…but you have a broken leg you get it fixed. You have a broken brain you’ll burn it out trying to fix it…been there, done that!

Listen to your treatment team and try what they are offering. I doubt you’d think the same after six weeks of doing what they say…untreated psychosis is brain damage and sure you’ll get positives most folks do but it’s not such a bad cop!

A person who’se been there,

Rogueone.

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I did what they said for 2 yrs man. No help.