It seems as if I am trapped traveling deeper into realities that meld into a more negative exsistance each day I wake.
Like my soul travel to alternate realities and stay in them like it slowly happens for a few week of time passing in one main exsistance…
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Pretty sure that’s delusional, dude.
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Sounds like you are having delusions.
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I know and it doesn’t seem to go away…it is very constant and seems be be getting worse thru out the passing days.
I wonder if I need more medication / maybe new medication.
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I have a chronic delusion that follows me around like a puppy. I can’t shake it so I understand the feeling. Maybe a new med or a different dose would help you. I tried to change meds and didn’t sleep for a week. I tried upping my dose and felt like I was jumping out of my skin. I am gun-shy now to change meds or increase my dose. As it stands though, I believe my brain is being controlled (my thoughts, feelings, behavior) and that I am being monitored and watched all the time including right now. I really believe that so I understand the strength of a delusion. I wish you the best of luck.
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I think the worst part is that I have so many many drug allergies… I can only take a few drugs out of many …
I truly think I need a med revamping , but am terrified of what will happen during such.
So I struggle daily with my shadow illusions and delusional thoughts as well.
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What med(s) do you take now and what dose?
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abilify 40 mg 1 x per day
Strattera 40 mg 1x per day
Lisonprel 20 mg 1x per day
visteral 50 mg as needed
and asthma meds
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I use to be on 80 mg abilify 1x per day but I then never slept…
and 60 mg straterra as well…
Oh, ya.Looks like you have the full gamete there. I have a Vistiril Rx too. I take 25mg tabs as needed for anxiety. I can get VERY anxious at times. It is frequently tied to my paranoia that I am going to be persecuted and/or sacrificed.
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some one actually tried to sacrifice me in reality… My step Grandmother nailed me to a cross… told me I was Satan…because I looked like my father… she was drunk and evil…
As you can tell I grew up in a very abuse environment…
OMG…are you serious? That’s horrible. Sounds like you are a survivor of major abuse. Did she nail your clothes to the cross or your flesh? Did she go to jail for that?
On my right lower leg I have a scar from where she nailed it with a rail road tie…into a cross made of 4x4’s… My mother was in mental hospital at the time an none could help me not even my loving biological grandfather {Her Hubby}.
I admire your courage to carry on after that. I was physically, emotionally and sexually abused as a child along with gross neglect but I can’t say that I was nailed to a cross. That’s a unique story. Your Mom was in a mental hospital and, obviously, your Grandma is/was mentally ill. Mental illness must run in your family.
Sorry about that. Looks painful.
I am covered with scars but they are from surgeries. My emotional scars are more numerous and run deeper but no one can see them. I have a nice tdoc who listens to me. Do you go to therapy? Have a tdoc?
My mom was severely mentally ill with schizophrenia… I sadly in inherited it… my Grandma was a step grandmother…She Grandmother is dead and buried now. Mother still alive barely living in group home missing her toes from frost bite and diabetes.
No Tdoc I wish for one I also have PTSD’s from life and boot camp… no Va Benifits… I also have billions of emotional scars as well …
surguries… well I’ve had 9 knee scopes for arthritus right side of large intestine removed gall bladder remove 4 stomache hernias and mess implant with full adominal hernia in work on getting repaired, and pancreantitus, and testicular hernia with mes repair… I dont think I should continue the list…