Ok, i talked to my doc about my jealousy and hate, she told me to up a little bit my zyprexa. But we are not sure it will work. she told me once again that the main in my illness is the socializing… yeah… idk which illness i have but its quite strange. Its not so much per acute episodes, its just one chronical suicidal state since i was kid. and here i am, 35 years old, quite fat, with no muscles, alone, without job, hobbies, interests, friends or boyfriend and with a depression i guess. I am tired of doing efforts. ill continue doing them but i am not sure ill get out of this…
There is also something which anguishes me - i lack some clearity of thoughts. I have a thought disorder i think and i lack my logic etc etc and i put hours in the morning to regain some normie like mindfullness. and still… i dont have energy cause i spend too much time at home… how i am gonna function one day? if it continues to be like this, my recovery will take decades for god sake?.. what do you do with someone who is tired of socializing???.. idk, lets pray that meds will work. ill try 10 mg one day on two. i had 7,5 mg every day till now. but in the past i just had bad side effects when increasing my zyprexa, that was all that i had :/…
wtv…maybe its a good thing that i started to feel some productive rage, i feel it more like this now cause in the past i was accepting too much and the others wereabusing this i guess…maybe i open my eyes slightly but its taking time i find lol… Its been one year and 3 months that i am on my meds and its just now that i see my real problems… My thinking was a mess when i landed in the hospital some years ago. my pdoc was chocked that i have this ‘‘torn’’ thinking, i wasnt thinking straight, it was jumping here and there and the bonus was one severe severe anhedonia…
take care people
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Sup princess…
Hostility and suspiciousness are one of the symptoms of schizophrenia. As for clarity of thoughts, you can try going to new places or doing new activities. Our brains like new experiences. Hopefully the new dosage works out for you.
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I thought the minimum dose of zyprexa for schizophrenia was 10mg? 