so its my grandmas 77th birthday and i called this twice but she was asleep both times. my grandpa said to call back in an hour or so…i was going to visit her but i was busy today even doing stupid ■■■■ that isnt important. my grandma is very sick . ifeel like a horrible person. my best friend isnt home so i have no one to go to. i hurt myself too. im going to see her tomorrow. …ive taken her for granted. id ont know how to show love right. something is wrong with me
I took people for granted too in psychosis, especially my aUnt and Uncle. I visited my Uncle in the hospital the other day though so I’m making up for it now. See her tomorrow, she will feel appreciated. It’s not your fault she was asleep both times you called. It sounds like you are trying to show love the best you can and that’s all people can really ask for…effort 
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thank you that means a lot. i talked to her and feel a little better now. i have faith in her. im going to pray for her. but for now i am scared that ssomeone is waiting to attack me…im home alone and afraid.
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