I'm unraveling

I’m having all kinds of weird thoughts and ideas.
Like “someone is drugging my beverages” and “I don’t deserve food, food is for the living”.
Darker thoughts too, but I won’t share them cause the thread will get unlisted.

I don’t know what to do.
I can’t afford the APs that will help, not even a doctor’s appointment to get the prescription. I can’t up the dose of the ones I’m taking now, cause I’ll be even more tired and I’m barely functional now.

Should I… Should I tell someone? Like the roomie?
It’s not like there’s anything anyone can do.

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I’m not sure how your medicare system works so it’s difficult to provide advice there. Do you have a crisis line you can call? They are usually staffed by social workers who are knowledgeable about resources in the local jurisdiction. They may be able to get you a free doctor’s visit or perhaps access to sampler packs of medications that doctors are given for free.

Let us know if you need help finding a crisis line to call in your area.

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Also please see these resources.

Hope this helps.

:heart:

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I used to have thoughts like those when I was psychotic. If you were in the U.S. you could probably go on medicaid and get your doctors visits and meds paid for but I have no idea what government services you have where you are. Maybe try a google search for government services in your country and see what’s available to you? IDK. Sorry, this is not much help, I know.

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DENMARK CRISIS LINE

https://www.livslinien.dk/

NORWEIGAN CRISIS LINE

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I live in Riga, Latvia, but the English here isn’t great, and I don’t speak any of the local languages

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English is such a widely used language that I am certain there must be some coverage for it at the crisis line. Have you tried calling?

Sending (((hugs)))

:heart:

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For myself personally, I tell my roommates when I’m not doing well. I’ve found that bottling it up inside and pretending like everything is okay only makes me feel more isolated, which in turn makes me worse

Thank you.
Not even goverment officiald or doctors speak English much, I doubt volunteers running a crisis line do any better.
But I guess it couldn’t hurt to try.

If you are in a country that you are not born in and are a citizen of a different country, try reaching out to your country’s embassy. It is their responsibility to help you find local support.

I really hate that the scandinavian crisis chatlines close so early. Most of my crises happen late in the evening, and I feel too watched to feel safe calling most of the time.

Niacin supplement helps me to not have those dark thoughts that leads me into pshycotic rabbit hole

I don’t even have time to call the crisis lines, I’m way behind on my assignment, but I’m gonna end up cracking if I don’t get a chance to unload soon

Why can’t you see a doctor and get meds? This isn’t the third world. You have a basic right to be seen and treated

Money money money 151515151515

You have a job?

They bill you for presenting at the hospital? I thought your country had socialized medicine.

IDK, I’ve started to relapse a few times but somehow pulled out of it. Is there anybody causing you undue stress? I was about a month or two from having a serious relapse because of a situation with a housemate. All the old feelings were popping up of a foggy mind, slowing down, feeling out of control. Then the guy moved out and a week or two later I was fine. If he would stayed just a month longer I probably would have ended up in the hospital.

And same thing with the neighbor upstairs. I don’t know if it’s me or him causing trouble but he’s driving me crazy. Just a few days ago the pressure was driving me crazy but the last few days I’ve been fine. But I was stressed just several days ago. Getting out of the house helps. Getting away from those guys upstairs. So maybe someone in your life is triggering or stressing you?

I spoke for 45 minutes to a nice lady on the Norwegian helpline, she calmed me down quite a bit.

@velociraptor here in Latvia it’s all about health insurance. Mine doen’t cover psych treatments.
I should have a blue EU card, but I can’t find it, and the Danish government won’t issue a new one.

@anon47167357 I have a job, yes. That’s the problem, I work way too much.
@77nick77 what’s stressing me is not having money for the right meds, knowing the side effects from these might kill me, and working over 55 hours a week.

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My dad told me life is all about solving problems. You have the problems identified; they are fairly obvious. Now how can you logically and reasonably solve them? Is your doctor going to let you die? Tell him you don’t want to die on these meds and ask him how he can help you or how he can steer you to the right help. Doctors aren’t stupid and they have resources and connections and knowledge of how to steer through the system. If it takes nagging and hounding him to help you find a way to get the right meds then do it.

Working 55 hours a week is ridiculous, it’s not sustainable for even most mentally healthy and physically healthy people. What can you do about that. Ask for less hours? Get a different job? Drastic problems take drastic measures. Maybe you should not be living in that area. Maybe you should not be living in that country. Maybe you need to do some research and move to a place where you can afford this meds and afford to work less hours. If the choice is between dying or moving to a better place for you, maybe you should move. If the choice is between living independently and relapsing or moving in with a family member and perhaps staving off a relapse then maybe that’s what you should do. Pull back a little in your life, rest awhile and recover and when you’re ready to tackle more, you’ll be ready.

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